From the Rock

A prophetic nightmare or just a dream in Libya?

2012-01-29T03:48:00.001+02:00

With the uncharted rolling power cuts that we have been having in Tripoli for over a month now it's been disruptive to planning your day/evening and work, so sometimes you just have to manage ad hoc and take your naps when you can and finish some late work when you can too.

For example you are planning to work on a report after dinner and when the house is quiet only to be 'surprised' by the electricity going off at 8 pm, since it won't be back before 11 pm at least and it's cold and you'rw freezing, there is not much to do really except go to bed.

That's why I'm awake now at 3 am, I slept from 8 pm till midnight when the electricity returned and then I played catch up with emails and such. But that's not the story....

While I fell asleep, I started dreaming that I was having difficulty swallowing and something was choking me in my throat; so in the dream I'm there poking my fingers inside my mouth trying to find the obstruction. Moving around I discover a string which I start to pull at with both my hands just like a floss string that I'm pulling out of my throat it seems. I feel better each time a section of it is coming out and it's really long, black and full of dripping mucus, this keeps going apparently for hours in the dream as I'm aware of monitoring the process with a wall clock, until finally I kind of hit rock bottom with this and the string is pulling at something in my throat and this part is now painful so I look in the mirror to try assess what is it that is stuck to the string only to find out that it is woven or pierced into the uvula in my throat ( believe me I had to check this term online as I never knew it although from numerous Tom and Jerry shows I knew what it was supposed to look like :P ).
In the dream, when I see this I know that I can no longer remove this string on my own and will need some type or surgical assistance, just like removal of a piercing but I have the fear of loosing the string if I put what's left of it back in my mouth. I'm already gagging at the thought.. so I cut the string to a manageable lenght about a metre and leave it hanging out of my mouth and simply continue freaking about how did I ever get into this kind of situation anyway...and I wake up when the lights in my room are back because the electricity in real life is back!

Would anyone care to offer any interpretation ? Can't be an indigestion can it ? it's too vivid

Harsh realities make some Libyans evoke the Gaddafi era with fondness

2012-01-23T10:21:00.001+02:00

Traffic jams are gigantic nowadays in Tripoli, so what I do to avoid getting stuck in one in the morning is park my car and walk the remaining distance to the office. It really saves time and frustration and of course good exercise :P

Classes usually start between 8.15 and 8.30 am and I can see busy parents rushing by with their children. Today I noticed a large crowd in front of a primary school and the fathers were gesticulating angrily and actively discussing some issue. It is worth nothing that public schools officially started on January 7 after about one year of disruption caused by the war that gripped the country; but the situation has not been ideal as not all Libyan school children are back to school as planned. There are some displaced in camps with their families in awful situations and others living in the destroyed cities that saw the most fighting after the liberation of Tripoli while others have their schools turned into refugee camps etc..

So I approached to see what was it that caught the attention of the parents on the notice board outside the school gate. It was an announcement about reduced school hours due to lack of teachers and school books.

The men were causing quite a commission and I overhead some of them saying "what have we gained from this revolution? the first things that has gone out of the window are safety, health and education. It was better in Moammar's era at least things were functioning and schools were organised. He must be laughing at us in his grave and if he could talk would have said I told you so!!!" The guy was obviously very upset because for 3 weeks now schools have been yo yoing back and forth and people are worried about the future of their children. The security situation though not at war is very difficult one with people armed to the teeth and trigger happy. As for health, knowing what health was before you know that now it is a hopeless case so many would sympathise with the sentiments and statements of this individual without necessarily being Gaddaffi fans or remnants of his regime. This is the feeling expressed by ordinary people on the streets after the euphoria of the revolution has subsided, the harsh realities of a post-conflict state are hitting home those most vulnerable among us and making them almost miss Gaddafi who now seems like a 'benevolent dictator'.

If interim government and qualified Libyans do not get a grip on things I'm afraid that the goodwill of Libyans will be lost, the martyr's blood would have gone in vain and we either start a new civil war or will turn into another Khalifate.

Today's post is pessimistic, hopefully next time there will be a more positive outlook !

Libya: we will not forget our brave ! .... will we ?

2012-01-08T19:34:00.000+02:00

An initiative has been launched on Facebook to commemorate the heroes and heroines of Libya, from 1969 till the end of the war of 2011.

This definition includes the fallen martyrs, the injured, the imprisoned and of course the missing.

Great idea to celebrate and honour these people's sacrifices ! However, where do our raped women stand? they have sacrificed too for Libya and their blood is just as precious and should not go in vain.

Males have been raped too, but females have it harder and are unable to reintegrate into society ( if they have survived the experience).

We need to acknowledge their sacrifice and give them medals of honour too! This would be one step towards helping remove the wrong stigma associated with 'dishonour and/or loss of virginity' which was absolutely none of their fault.

Christmas in Libya

2011-12-25T23:52:00.000+02:00

Two years ago, I vowed not to remember anyone's special celebrations unless they remembered mine. I was offended at how come I wished all my friends and acquaintances Christmas, Chanukah, Veterans Day, Independence Day, Nairuz etc... and those same people only remembered Christmas and New Year, no good wishes at all directed to the Muslim world. I checked and checked on Facebook to see any reaction this year too and it was only from the usual suspects less than 3 people in total ( apart from the Arabs), who do remember every date. The others would remember silly birthdays but nothing more it was as if our festivities do not exist even my Asian friends who have a mix in their respective countries did not remember so I was not going to blame the other folks...

So for all the talk about multiculturalism and melting pots not sure it is working some people think they are superior. The only ones who turned to have the real spirit of multiculturalism were Arabs funnily enough.

And to prove it this is a first in Libya now that Ghaddafi is gone even the Tripoli Post is wishing readers Merry Christmas - go Libya GO ! well done !

So in the true spirit of Christ who originated from our part of world, I am taking my vow back and wishing everyone and not just the usual suspects publicly everything good for whichever occasion is at hand. After all if someone is not a good person we do not need use the same style of treatment....and here is my first new year resolution...

Merry Christmas everyone !

PS have you wished Libyans a Happy Independence Day ? it was yesterday on Christmas Eve :P

Versatile Blogger Award : The Libyan Bloggers

2011-12-12T01:23:00.000+02:00

First of all I want to thank Khadijateri who has awarded me and a number of other Libyan bloggers this award.

To explain about it I'm going to use the same words she did - so much easier and I'm being lazy tonight !
and I agree with her 100% that internet connection has not been good lately bordering on the unreliable, but to be honest it is difficult to be mad after all the country has been through a war an I'm grateful that a lot of things still work.. ok back to the award :)

What is it?

The award is a kind of pay-it-forward award. Those who receive it are asked to thank and link to the giver and then elect 5 to 15 other bloggers with the Versatile Blogger Award and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog.

Khadijateri beat me to some of my favourite bloggers :) so....

Who gets the award now ?

It's difficult to choose from so much talent, Libyans had to be creative in the Gaddafi era and now there is so much we want to talk about . So I really want to award this to all the Libyan bloggers and bloggerettes and a large number of them are collected in this blog those who write in Arabic and those who write in English and some write in a few other languages. Please click on them all pick your choice and then please come back and tell me who did you like and what did you find special about their writing ?

The Highlights of a Libyan Meal Plan: Guest Column by Carolyn K

2011-12-11T21:14:00.000+02:00

Carolyn from Blog Content Guild has recently come across my rant on the Islamist wave sweeping the region on the trails of the so called Arab Spring ( I hate that cliche), and she suggested to publish a piece here about what can be learned from the culture of Libya through its traditions and food.

Why not? I said and here we are.....I admit it feels strange to read about Libyan dishes presented thus but it certainly is a change for me from war and politics ! right ?

This post has actually reminded me of wonderful British-Libyan blogger Soad whose recipes and the end product are absolutely delicious so if you want to check what Libyan food looks like and try out how it tastes please make a stop at her blog as well.

Ok no more chit chat from me here is Carolyn talking :

"Food in Libya is some of the best in the world, and people should relish in the delicious recipes Libya has to offer, when they can. The people of Libya know how to cook lamb. In fact, it has been asserted by some that lamb is cooked more in Libya than in any other place else in the world. If this is true, it means that there is no shortage of opportunity to eat some delicious lamb in the country. Fortunately for people who find themselves in Libya, the delicious meal plan options aren’t limited to just lamb. There is an array of scrumptious meal offerings to be enjoyed. Here are a few dishes that Libya is famous for:

1. Bazin – This dish is essentially a ball of dough (from barley flour) in the middle of delicious stew. The stew includes lamb, potatoes, tomato paste, olive oil, and spices like turmeric.

2. Shorba Libiya –Libya is famous for its delicious soups, and it is most famous for Shorba Libiya. This is a lamb and chickpea soup that is traditionally eaten during Ramadan or for other special occasions. It usually has minty and coriander undertones and a spicy kick to it. If you’re in the mood for this soup, you’re in luck. You can find it just about anywhere in Libya.

3. Sand Baked Bread – Some bread bakers in Libya will actually bake their bread in the hot sand. In general, bread in Libya is hearty in taste and in terms of thickness. If the idea of eating bread that is baked in sand isn’t your cup of tea, you can get pick up some delicious bread baked in a tagine (a clay or terra-cotta pot) instead.

4. Magrood – If you want to satisfy your sweet tooth in Libya, you have to try magrood. It’s a pastry dipped in sugar syrup with a date filling. Be careful, though. It’s easy to eat a whole plate of magrood cookies and end up with a stomachache from all the sugar!

5. Usban – This Libyan sausage is the perfect snack to fill you up before your next hearty Libyan meal. Usban is typically stuffed with herbs, rice, lamb, and liver. So, it’s sure to please your palate and help fulfill your body’s daily protein quota.

So, warm your heart with some Shorba Libiya and spend some time savoring all of the wonderful food Libya has to offer! "

So I would LOVE for my readers Libyans and non Libyan alike (those that still exist of course and I want to publicly thank you here and make a virtual curtsey for sticking with me :P !) to share their reactions with me, please tell me what do you think these dishes say about the Libyan culture and are Libyans really lovers of lamb meat - I would vote yes for kharouf watani :P !

Libya, Western policy & the so called Islamists: when you cannot beat them, join them!

2011-12-02T00:06:00.000+02:00

After spending part of the 20th Century funding and forging alliances with anyone with an 'Islamist' agenda to counter Communism, the US and the Western world in general decided Islamists were the bad guys. So then they spent the next decade fighting them all over the globe even if they were democratically elected. Post 9/11 it was even worse and there was total breakdown in communication. This attitude from the West has helped fuel hatred towards not only Islamists but really anything and anyone Muslim (at least that's my impression) which fell right into the lap of the extremists and helped further their plans thereby resulting in a vicious cycle of violence that targeted not only western interests but ordinary Muslims and non- Muslim alike.

The horrible wars fought by proxy in countries such as Afghanistan, Iraq, Somalia etc.... are a witness to this yet it was and has always been a loosing war for the western powers; with resounding defeats in my opinion in Pakistan, Iraq, Afghanistan and Somalia and Sudan. Troops are pulling out steadily but surely, which means that they will have to come to accept these 'people' and negotiate some kind of honourable retreat a la Iraq for example. The Taliban are still powerful in Afghanistan, the Iranian mullahs have gotten hold of Iraq, Pakistan? no comment and Somalia is run by those Shababs, Sudan ? they had to be pushed into partition, Palestine, into a civil war, Algeria are still reeling from their post election war in the 90s that seem to have put them out of the 'Arab Spring ' loop for the moment ....etc.....etc...

There is a saying which I oft repeat "when you cannot beat them, join them" and that is a wise advice :) but the US and the Western world cannot do this without looking like losers and like all this money and the lives lost were for nothing. So to save face the iconic figure of Islamic fundamentalists had to be demolished. Nothing more cathartic then murdering Bin Ladin to send the right message, to back home, to your average Arab and Muslim but also to your so called Islamist. The message was that if we get this 'victory' we bury the hatchet and you guys get the opportunity to for the first time of your life get on the political stage legally.

So when Arab countries started to revolt I was sure that whatever I brought up here would be kicking in fast along with the political machinery that goes with it. The other dimension is the involvement of ambitious GCC countries not exactly beacons of democracy and who fear Iran's domination and whose human rights record is appalling .

To prove my conspiracy theory let's glance at the newspaper headlines for 2011 post 'Arab Spring' developments:

Islamist leader named Morocco PM [source]
Tunisia Islamist Party wins vote [source]
Islamist strong ahead of Egypt poll [source]
Fatah Hamas prepare to bury the hatchet [source]

Saudi Arabia is the bedrock of Wahhabism and yet is America's best ally, Qatar is forging a name for itself and funnily has been linked from the beginning in the Libyan uprising and other pots. The Bahrain revolution has been violently stymied down, Syria is heading towards civil war unless a miracle happens, Yemen we are in season two of the revolution and not sure what the world is waiting for, Lebanon is in such a mess that nothing needs to be done to make it worse, Oman saw a very short lived movement and Saudi Arabia pumped money to its people, Jordan is trying a balancing act, Kuwait had the daring movement of the storming of its parliament and so many other examples all over the region

Even in Libya it seems that the US would give it's blessings to an Islamic government as long as its own interests are safeguarded check this headline. We need to remember that this cleric mentioned here is believed to be an American /Qatari stooge by a large number or Libyans....and he has ambitions of( or for his party) to lead in Libya.

Who would have thought this possible a mere year ago? the key word seems to be 'moderate' Islamist. Nevertheless it is a U turn for the US and others and now it seems that it has been decreed that the old dictators were no longer useful, they are ushering a new breed disguised under something that they believe will be acceptable to the people.

The fishy stink is can be smelled from kms away... I want to be optimistic for the freedom, but I don't dare lest my hopes are dashed to the ground. May I be wrong and just a crying Cassandra but in light of what is happening and what has happened in 2011, my words on Feb 28 of this year now seem almost prophetic:

I am terrified that when all the ashes from the uprisings that are consuming us settle down we become blinded by the celebratory mood and find ourselves having exchanged one agenda for another whose nature would be like an octopus: soft but with many slippery tentacles."

I'm not angry or bitter but simply realistic and accept the truths, I hope that in Libya we do not fall into this trap as I have nothing against Islamists on the contrary a lot of their ideas sound very valid and strike a vein but I do not want them with the blessings of America, it just means they are the new puppets. Libyans are not dumb but I hope that for the sake of peace they do not let themselves be played with like pieces on a chess board.

And finally as I said, the west could not beat them and so decided to embrace them and the choices of its regional allies and influence the democratic process.... sigh

New Libyan Currency: where is the democracy ?

2011-11-27T18:37:00.001+02:00

Tawasul news agency announced on Facebook the imminent issue/arrival of the newly minted Libyan currency of a which I'm publishing a photo below taken from their website.

In my humble opinion and my knowledge of economics is limited to non-existent, a new currency is not the top priority in Libya. If true the new money looks nice but we should not be wasting money on it we could have survived with the old Libyan notes, even the ones with Gaddafi's face on and thank God it was only the One Dinar currency and more recently the 50 Dinar currency which I actually rarely saw since it came to the market a year or so ago.

Some people say that having these new banknotes will make the ones taken out of the country invalid and so help restore the economy and will hit those who have been hoarding money and starving the marked of cash. So re-introducing badly needed cash would hit two birds with one stone... maybe I really don't know how this works and if this is the solution to fight all the war profiteers. Yet again I think a new currency would have been the last step before the transitional period ended in 2013. Like this it feels to me as if someone has made a business deal somewhere but most importantly who decided this step ? have Libyans been asked about their opinion? has their been a national referendum ? What a waste of time and resources...

I hope I'm wrong... what do you think ?

Bab Al Azizia: dark memories, unilateral decisions and dirty politics

2011-11-25T19:36:00.000+02:00

The Bab Al Azizia barracks have been there for as long as I can remember, in recent years the outside walls were repainted and the surrounding streets restyled but it still looked formidable and forbidding.

It has been so much a fact of life that we tried to tune it out. However, whenever we passed nearby I could never help being nervous that my car would breakdown and I would be shot and I believe most of us even avoided looking its way, or at other cars...

This heavy omnipresence was stifling and only in early November did I actually venture inside the compound. I saw people visiting from literally all over Libya, people who had made the trip especially to shake away those bygone ghosts and see for themselves that the most despised place for them was no longer a threat. I still cannot believe that the place that symbolized more than anything else the Gaddafi regime no longer existed. The walls and every single building in that compound has been destroyed.

I do remember that many of us were talking what should be done with Bab Al Azizia and many spoke online that they wanted a park, but I don't remember any countrywide poll about this!

Somehow, I'm not happy that it has been razed to the ground I think that was just done too soon and without checking with the Libyan people. It is unfair for the rest of Libyans to have prevented them for having access and seeing for themselves the layout of the place.

The sprawling compound is eerie and I expect ghosts to come out anytime it's even dangerous now, all this rubble and the open tunnels. Is it even environmentally safe? is there asbestos exposed? Who took the decision to raze it so unprofessionally and to burn the living quarters there and what about the school ? why destroy the school for God's sake ? children from the neighbouring buildings used to go there and now they have nowhere to go. What a waste of resources!

By all means I want to see a park there, but I also wanted to have some mementos kept to remind us of how dictatorships can happen if we let our vigilance slip. Why have some rebel fighters taken the golden fist statue to Misrata? In my opinion it should have remained here it's not about war trophies it's about history.
It would have been a great theme park but now it is a wasteland, full of rubbish , revolutionary tourist items, looters who have taken the wiring, the stuff in the houses, the things hidden in the underground tunnels and I was actually afraid that there might be some unexploded ordnance somewhere when driving or walking around to explore. It's a place of desolation for me. Not sure how you can have picnic there with all the piled up waste. I'm disappointed. I had imagined foreigners coming from all over the world to see Gaddafi's feared tunnels, people exploring them and seeing in which part of the city they ended up, I imagined photo shoots next to the Fist golden statue, I imagined people taking turns to appear on his balcony and make a speech something like the Speaker's Corner in Hyde Park. I wanted the buildings to be professionally removed with some of them converted to museums if possible.....but I did not want this mess. Reconstruction is very difficult while destruction takes so little time. The tunnels would have brought so much income to the park authorities and would have helped towards the cost of the maintenance.

A counter argument could be that destroying the compound prevents any militia from making it a fortress, but I don't believe the person(s) who made this decision thought so analytically.

They say there is no use crying over spilled milk and I agree but I still wanted to voice my opinion and that this way of things suits all those war profiteers which are always present like vultures in every combat in any place in the world. This destruction makes it easier to loot the place unpunished like so much of the public property (and private) during and after this war in Libya. All Libyans had a right to Bab Al Aziziya and someone just took our right away.

Apparently a contest to redesign the place has been launched, nice idea but I still hope to see that Fist back in Tripoli in the park whenever it is finished ! It starts with little things and ends up with people holding a country hostage to have their way in the government and those that don't get their way well the the big fish somehow slip away instead again to show the government who is really boss.

March in support of the victims of rape in Libya: "You are not Alone … We are here for you"

2011-11-25T12:49:00.000+02:00

(taken from Facebook - organized by the Phoenix group)

On the occasion of the "International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women", Organized, and in participation of civil society entities in several Libyan cities

We announce the beginning of the national initiative to support & help the brave Libyan rape victims on Saturday 26 -11-2011. The initiative will include an awareness raising campaign and related lectures given by legal, religious & psychological specialists on how to offer psychological support to he victims and their families and how to help them rise above the challenges they face in our society and how to reintegrate in the society .

There will be a silent protest in front of the prime ministry headquarters (previously the general people’s committee headquarters) Sekka road. Also there will be a similar silent protest taking place Misrata in order to draw the transitional national council and Mr . Elkeeb’s government - and all officials who are of concern within it – attention to this category of war victims who haven’t received the sufficient care and support yet.

To those who are interested in joining the protest (Tripoli) :

• The protest will be taking place on November 26th . 2011 . The initial gathering spot in Tripoli will be Ben Ashour street in front of zuwadah restaurant at 11 Am .
• The march will go along Ben Ashour street to Alqadisiya square and to Sekka street at the prime ministry Headquarters till 3 pm .
• The unified dressing code will be white and pink tops in solidarity with rape victims.
• Please put a duck tape across your mouth to symbolize the silence this case is being dealt with.
• Due to the sensitivities of this subject please abide with the banners , slogans shared by the organizers .

Misrata

• Alhurria square with the same hours, banners, dressing code as Benghazi & Tripoli .

Our Demands:

• To adjust the penal code legislation & raise the bar of the rape crime penalty in accordance to shari’a .
• To provide logistic and financial support to the NGOs welling to undertake the set up of psychological support programs and provide needed assistance to raped women.
• To improve and strengthen the role played by “The Islamic Invitation Association “ to raise the religious awareness of the victims and their families to prevent “ honour crimes “ and similar forms of abuse to the victims .
• To urge the national media outlets to provide a more brave and open approach in the discussion of this case, and what has been done about it and to discuss the “ honour crimes “ affecting this category by their families and to help as a powerful tool to raise and spread awareness and support messages to encourage those who are affected to seek help by the specialized centres

Qaddafistan Perversion

2011-11-17T02:00:00.001+02:00

Today's post was going to be about a movie I watched a few weeks ago when I was travelling but something else happened instead which led me to change the topic so you will read about the movie next time.

This morning I decided to go for a walk downtown and check the Libyan printed press. Since the liberation of Tripoli in August many new titles have sprung up and we are also getting the papers from Benghazi and other cities in Libya which is so refreshing and feels very strange....A glossy magazine called Loloat Almutawaset caught my eye among the many choices on display nowadays because I did not notice it before. I think it looked so professional that I assumed it was an Arab paper although I should have recognized the guy on the cover page but anyway we have just finished a war I could be excused for not noticing many things :)!

Taking a closer look I found it was issue no.1 from October so this was going to be a monthly magazine great. I looked at the lead titles and the topic that jumped at me was "The orphanage victims" or the daughters of Quaddafi ( my comment) I purchased it for 3 Libyan Dinars.

The article was an interview by Abdelbasset Alsherif with a 30 year old Libyan woman who grew up in an orphanage in Libya. I summarised it briefly from the Arabic for you.

Orphanages in Libya were a red line in the Quaddafi era. The author is calling this woman Krista so I will use the same name. Krista was born in the orphanage and was given to adoption to a Libyan family She only learned that she was an orphan at the age of 6 when her step father died ( probably because the rest of the family asked about inheritance). I believe she ends up in this interview because of her role as a Quaddafi human shield in Bab Alaziziya.

She tells stories about being forced by the orphanage management as a child to attend events where Quaddafi is to show up and how she felt just like a movie extra, where he would be nice to her and the others for a couple of days and then her role will be over and the niceties with it once the event was over. Krista explains that most orphans were given for 'adoption' and if you were lucky you got a decent family if not you ended up in a brothel.
After the death of her adoptive parents it seems she was left to fend for herself. Moreover, the orphanage although it called these girls Quaddafi's daughters did not spend any penny on them but either left them to fend for themselves/thew them to the street or gave them up for prostitution as only a limited number with certain specifications was kept. The majority of the girls became prostitutes and the guys drug dealers. ( personally I suspect that some of the guys became gay prostitutes too as some of my foreign friends sadly reported they found many on the sea front ). Krista did many jobs including washing cars and even mounted satellite dishes on rooftops to survive ! and no one would help her because of the label that she and her likes were Quaddafi's daughters so they were supposed to have everything. Even when the orphanage would do the occasional multiple marriage gig it was apparently a big lie as the girls would be thrown out after a couple of days of being abused.....or end up sex slaves in a hotel. The money that the orphanage management would receive from donations and the state all went into the deep pockets of the corrupt officials.

About her limited role in Bab Alaziziya she says that she went there for the food and to get some money but she stopped going there when it became obvious that there was drugs, alcohols and fornication. She then volunteered as a guard in the former Green Square and after that was sent on a mission to Misrata.

How she ended up in Misrata? she and the others were asked to guard an aid caravan that was supposedly going to Misrata but instead to her horror they took them to a camp to be trained to kill. She ran away with one of the male volunteers. She hid in the city of Gharian until the liberation of that city. Krista is feeling very guilty for supporting Quaddafi and being misled like this and is saying that she is one of hundreds of other lost girls from the Libyan orphanages that need to be rescued from a life of prostitution in order to survive.She also asks that we should not to forget the guys as well. She is asking the revolutionary youth not to denigrate those lost young men and women as they are simply victims of Quaddafi.

After I read this article I was deeply troubled, so I thought I'd surf the twitting people to change my mood and there someone sent me the following link: Viagra munching Gaddafi. This article is about Faisal, Quaddafi's manservant, Chef ( and probably occasional bed companion).

"He was a law student at Tripoli University when Gaddafi came to speak. Afterwards the dictator asked his office to track down several of the students. Gaddafi’s lectures were notorious; he would speak about his Green Book and then take his pick of the women to a room near the lecture hall with a double bed.
The university dean told Faisal that Gaddafi wanted him to be his private servant. When he refused, his family was threatened; to continue to refuse would mean death."

Faisal of course ended in this article because on Quaddafi's fall he was taken as a prisoner by the freedom fighters for being close to the dictator.

After reading about Faisal's woes and the world of perversion he uncovered I was even more depressed because everything we suspected was going on in Libya turned out to be true and even worse than we ever imagined. So I closed Twitter and I tried to cheer myself up by checking on my friends on Facebook, and what do I find there among the many shared articles this time in French: " A Kadhafi sex slave talks about her ordeal" !

22 year old Safia life is destroyed when Quaddafi's team kidnap her in Sirte at the age of 15 to take her to him. Quaddafi picked her up among the students who were chosen to hand him flowers when he visited her school. She was taken to his tent in the desert and told she would have riches etc... and would live with him from now on. Which is exactly what happened, he put her in his harem in Bab Alaziziya, where he kept Libyan adolescent women and also brought in some foreigners occasionally and proceeds to rape her for the next five years until her escape in 2009 During those years he forces her to drink, smoke and get drugged on top of everything else and her parents are threatened with death if they complain. Safia lifts the veil even further on the debauchery going on in Quaddafi's life and that of his henchmen and foreign visitors (something like Berlusconi's Bunga Bunga parties ... maybe that's why they were such friends ? ). She also talks about his famous body guards ( but I will make a separate post about that). After her escape her mum wants to marry her to an elderly widowed cousin which she refuses. She finally gets married this year in April but is separated from her husband who is apparently hurt during the war ( we are not told if he is from the rebels of from the Q team but I understand from the context that he is from the rebels). She does not feel safe to return home because of the possibility of being assassinated by some Quaddafi loyalist remnants but mostly due to the stigma attached to her past. She says 'the woman is always the culprit' [no matter what].

Reading all these dark pieces today printed all over the globe from Australia, Libya and France and which drag the honour of Libyan men and women in the gutters, I felt that I wanted to vomit and that I needed to write about it to exorcise these demons, but also to pass on the message that these young men and women are simply helpless victims. None of them should feel guilty either for supporting Quaddafi during the war like Krista or for being forced to pimp men and women for him like Faisal or for being a sex slave like Safia and all the other people he abused. These people had no other choice except suicide to escape his filth and even then they could not guarantee he would not abuse their whole families, which is exactly what he does, so sacrificing oneself is the only solution in case you have a family. In Krista's case no one was going to help her even work as a maid as people would suspect her of wanting to seduce the man of the family or be a bad influence on the kids, or just for being a bastard, so either she kills herself or prostitutes herself, since suicide is forbidden in Islam and she did not want to be a prostitute she worked like a man and volunteered as a guard during the war.

Our society is very very unforgiving in matters of honour, and now post revolution we are also very suspicious of everyone involved with Quaddafi.. But people like Krista are small fish and they have no blood on their hands and people like Faisal and Safia need years of rehabilitation.....I don't even know if my compatriots amidst all the horrors that took place in Libya for 42 years and until the war ended will be able to absorb how much these poor creatures deserve our pity and need our help. In the Libyan article the author concludes by asking if Krista really believed that the Quaddafi era was over from the people's minds? She acquiesces that it is over.

Each one of us is somehow suffering post traumatic stress to one degree or another so personally I think the Quaddafi era can only be erased from our minds once we feel compassion for all victims alike, such as the protagonists above and the alleged 8000 rape victims ( men/women/children) being investigated by the ICC and not just the obvious ones like the dead, imprisoned, injured, amputees, missing and displaced - that's a lot of suffering people.

Somebody would probably comment why bring this topic up, this is what the Western media likes to talk about there are more pressing issues to deal with. Yes that's true, Western media love sex scandals, and what happened in Libya and in Quaddafi's lair happens daily not only in other Arab countries but everywhere where power and money are absolute.;one recent very simple example is the DSK scandal.

However, Quaddafi ruined the life of about six million people in Libya and this was one of the many facets of his savagery to us so if we don't get all this rot out, deal with it and move on it will keep hitting us in the face and prevent the advancement of the Libyan Society and any national reconciliation.

Game Over Gaddafi

2011-10-21T10:59:00.001+02:00

Congratulations to all my compatriots! Today the fighting ends officially in Libya.

A death is not a happy occasion but the death of Gaddafi in particular gives a sense of closure to the battered hearts of Libyans all over the world. Libyans needed to see him die in Libya. His death in Libya provides a sense of satisfaction that a trial no matter how 'fair' could not have done.
Such a clean cut is the best medicine for the wound that has been oozing in Libya for decades.

How he met his end is confusing that's what I'm trying to figure out and I do have some reservations about this, but it does not come as a shock. Some say he was alive when captured and the videos we saw on TV and online show that; others say he was badly injured, eyewitness seem to have conflicting accounts.

"Arab broadcasters showed graphic images of the balding, goateed Gadhafi -- wounded, with a bloodied face and shirt -- but alive.
Later video showed fighters rolling Gadhafi's lifeless body over on the pavement, stripped to the waist and a pool of blood under his head.Standing, he was shoved along a Sirte road by fighters who chanted "God is great." Gadhafi appears to struggle against them, stumbling and shouting as the fighters push him onto the hood of a pickup truck.He was driven around lying on the hood of a truck, according to the video. One fighter is seen holding him down, pressing on his thigh with a pair of shoes in a show of contempt." [ref]

However, it would come as no surprise that people would not hold themselves and would have finished him off after capturing him as the overwhelming feeling in Libya was to cut him to shreds if one had the opportunity. It seems the same thing happened to his son Moatassim as well. Live capture and then death.

I was not waiting for his death to feel that Libya had been liberated, the fall of Tripoli on August 20 was Independence day for me and Gaddafi's killing has occurred exactly as I expected most of my adult life i.e. extremely violently.

I've been grappling with bitter sweet feelings triggered by an acquaintance's comment ( who is not Libyan) who told me last night that it was too fishy that just one day following Hillary Clinton visits to Libya Gaddafi gets killed : "she probably ordered his assassination herself and was here to see it through- telling the NTC and any NATO troops to finish with the Libya movie script". This friend told me now you will see Highlander, as soon as his death is confirmed NATO and the US will pull out of Libya as their mission has ended.
Why do some people insist on ruining the happiness of Libyans with these types of comments? Just like most Arabs I love conspiracy theories but not sure how to digest this one. I want to say that we are not dumb we understand human nature and the self interest of nations including the Western world ( who had helped and propped up the Arab dictators for decades and then removed them when no longer useful) but let us just have a small time to savour the event - we have suffered incredibly for most of our life and especially these last 9 months, thousands of Libyans have lost lives, limbs and property for freedom we deserve to grab some moments of celebration.

May the Libyan martyrs rest in peace not just those from 2011 but all those who died because of him and fighting him throughout those 42 year.

Red flag of McCarthyism in the new Libya ?

2011-10-07T16:46:00.004+02:00

McCarthyism : is the practice of publicizing accusations of political disloyalty or subversion with insufficient regard to evidence.

Last month we were all happily incredulous to hear from the NTC that the 'state security prosecution and courts, which sentenced opponents of the old [Gadaffi ]regime to prison' were to be abolished. This meant that the principal purpose of the old Internal Security Agency (ISA) was gone. The ISA was a cross of the worst attributes between the FBI and Homeland Security, it sawed fear in Libyans' hearts and abused Libyans and non-Libyans alike who had the misfortune to fall in its hands as any country with a despot or powerful blind 'homeland security' knows and where the most dangerous accusation was for not being a patriot. A patriot in Libya included in its criteria the persona of the 'Leader of the Revolution' Moammar Gadaffi.

Ironically enough the fact that this government body by spying on all your online and offline activity knew or sought to know everything about your private and public life was in a way comforting, as you could stop fearing it. If they never approached you and if you never dabbled in politics or showed an inclination to free thinking it meant you were considered harmless to them and you could go on leading the semblance of a normal life: that is eat, sleep, study , raise a family, work, and have whatever type of entertainment you can afford even if non halal (as long as you are discreet). If this was your cup of tea and you were lucky that no one was jealous enough of you to make false accusation against you, you could survive in Gaddafi's Libya.

So having this apparatus basically dismantled by abolishing the courts above and by the de facto disappearance of its most hated components due to the war was a breath of fresh air and some Libyans dreamed that there will no longer be a Damocles sword hanging over their heads ready at any time to cut it off. But it would be naive to believe that any government can survive without internal security and so it came with no surprise to read today that although the old ISA was being effectively dissolved by the NTC they were instead
"setting up a security agency whose main task would be to root out those who remain loyal to deposed autocrat Muammar Gaddafi in towns and cities it now controls."

Reading the words of the internal affairs' minister raises a huge red flag for those who still had an atom of hope that things could be different in Libya in terms of how security. Now this hope has the potential to be dashed at all the prospective abuses that the Libyans could be experiencing at the hands of an organisation whose force would be giddy with the newly achieved feeling of power as Power is irresistible!

As long as the NTC have not clarified how exactly this organisation was going to hunt loyalists and what is the definition of a loyalist and how exactly justice will be meted out it is feared a new McCarthyism type of witch hunt could be unleashed which would open the gates of vengeance and private retribution. This is apparently already taking place in Libya at some level with the currently fashionable expression 'fifth column' being brandished left and right but because of the nature of the Libyan terrain and the vastness of its land only mild echoes reach the international news agencies with most reporting saying that this or that place is being crushed because there are still pockets of Gaddafi's army while in truth it is allegedly a personal pogrom led by a city against another, a family against another and a region against another or a neighbour against another. This is human nature! But having an organisation with one specific mandate is really really scarier than the old ISA.

Since internal security in all its factions is an essential component of the state Libyans are expecting that we will have the opportunity to rebuild it along proper guidelines identifying exactly what would the role of this force be and what threats was it going to protect Libyans against.

However with this projected anti-loyalist hunters with no clear mandate it means that we will have people spying on Libyans in all the cities as before, and a number of shadow organisations who answer only to God knows who minus the comfort of knowing that at least they knew everything about you and so will leave you alone as these people are going to start from scratch to protect their hard acquired power. Any one who read about the Stanford prison experiment would understand.

Could this be the direct result of the cyanide we all drank and which I discussed in the previous post of am I just being pessimistic today ?

Reflections on fourty years of leaking cyanide in Libya

2011-09-18T02:20:00.000+02:00

This post is about answering a number of questions that you have posed to me in your emails. I tried to combine them all in one place. I probably did something similar about five years ago …. I hope it helps assuage the readers curiousity.

For the record, I am a native Libyan who has lived the majority of her life in Tripoli with my family. Yes obviously the war has affected our daily life in Tripoli. The majority had a similar experience to what Khadijater wrote in her diary of the past few months.

Not going to work meant that I had a lot of time on my hand. At the end of February beginning of March I passed through a phase of stupor where I would be sleeping a lot of the time during the day. I think it was a 10 day period. Then I got myself together and realised there was no point in having a nervous breakdown because it was just not my style. I looked at myself in the mirror on that fateful morning and saw how my once black hair had turned white. It was not like having your first warning of white hairs no it was whole patches of white hair, pepper and salt . Now people tell me it's not really that much but I notice it is , the black does not look the jet black of old times because the white is tempering in. It was a shock for me. Not the shock of getting old, I know my age lol, but the shock of it happening overnight.

Life was never the same not only for us in Tripoli but for any of us in Libya. Before the uprising most Libyans had stopped watching Libyan state TV ( there was not any other kind of Libyan TV anyway) except for Ramadan when we liked to watch the Libyan programmes. But once the war started we would be checking the Libyan TV along with all the other satellite channels. The Libyan media was taken aback at the beginning but they quickly recovered and deployed all their arsenal. To be honest we have to give them credit for putting up that façade for so long. Six months is a long time to stand in the face of the international deluge and giant media machine.

Regardless of whether you were pro or anti Gaddafi, those people manning the broadcasting station had the hardest job of all. To be vilified by millions and yet keep having to do this job because it was a matter of not your own survival but probably that of your family members. Just check what Ruwida has to say:

"i was afraid because not only me even every part of my family will be harmed , non of my relatives can live there normal lives simply and this anti Qaddafi stigma can be inherited too , and you cant get paper that you dont have any anti Qaddafi relatives"

She is talking about blogging but this applies to anything in Libya. This is someone who lives thousands of kilometers away from Tripoli in Benghazi and can still feel the heavy arm of the Gaddafi regime so what do you think is the fate of those living in Tripoli where he has all his 'machine' with him ?

Having an anti – Gaddafi stigma is non erasable even if you have been informed it was forgotten and you were forgiven, they can still throw it at your face whenever they want. Being neutral was slightly safer until someone decided to 'out' you to the authorities and then only God could help you. This poisoned atmosphere is how we lived for 40 years and it has increased a hundred fold by the first week of February 2011. Is it any wonder why so many Libyans had heart disease, diabetes, hypertension and even cancer or why are we on the top list of dangerous driving countries ?

Just some food for thought, there will probably be a sequel for this post so much pent up stuff that needs to be released.

The first few days of the revolution in Tripoli

2011-08-29T14:33:00.001+02:00

This is a sequel to my previous post.

On Friday February 18 Twitter went offline early in the morning, everything else still worked. Though there were rumours of demonstrations in various part of the city I went to buy some things and it was a ghost town. Yes I know that Friday is usually quieter in Tripoli, but not this way. This felt wrong. The usual shops from which I bought groceries were closed and on the way back I ran into a pro Gaddafi group of men who were handing out flags and pictures by force by stopping the cars going in that street. There was also a group of them fighting with each other about money. So I simply turned into another street. They had guns and I was afraid that they would harm the other passengers in my car who should not be made to pay were I to reply in a less than perfect manner. The feeling of insecurity in the streets of a city I knew so much was unfamiliar and disturbing. It was something else to add to the things we needed to get used to…
.
At 8 pm internet was shut down and Al Jazeera was jammed off the air. A family member abroad called and said to get the hell out of Libya if we could.
By then we were glued to TV , both ocal and foreign and I was checking regularly if internet was back. At half an hour past midnight, internet was back only to be shut down along with the mobile carrier at 1.30 am on February 19.

On Saturday February 19 we were following the news on Benghazi as many martyrs had fallen, at the same time we were listening to distant gunfire. I could not decide where it originated, but the news was also mentioning horrible things happening in Misurata.

On February 20 cell phone coverage was back and internet was sporadic in bursts. I went to the office and first thing I did was check with my friend from Misurata. He said he drove all the way from there this morning and life was normal on his side of town. So I felt relieved that maybe the Misurata news was just a rumour. A sibling called me from overseas and said Highlander this is really serious – leave Libya ASAP.

Some friends started calling me to say that foreign companies were closing and running away. There was too much tension at work and we all simply left the office early, because there were news about demonstrations and rallies in a number of areas in Tripoli.
I went to the bank to gauge the situation and I saw that people had made a run for it. Customers had withdrawn all their life savings so there was no cash left when I got there at noon. People were standing with king size luggage full of cash it was alarming. The teller informed me that I could withdraw my money in foreign currency if I wanted. That was a big tip but I did not head it, plus anyway where was I going to put this? It is very unsafe to keep cash at home and I did not need a lot just someone to keep us going for a few weeks.

So I tried another branch, and they ran out of cash too, telling me to come back tomorrow. The activity in the city was definitely abnormal with the military cars parked at various intersections and unusual aircraft activity overhead. I felt very emotional and near tears with anticipation of all that I knew was going to happen and which I had no control off.
I went to the supermarket and purchased dry food and tinned food and cat food and health and hygiene items. With hindsight that was a good decision as this was going to last the family for a couple of months. By noon sms stopped working and in the evening the mobiles and landlines were all cut. In the night we could hear distant and not so distant thuds. War had started in Libya.

On February 21 it was really unsafe to venture out of the house; we were all glued to TV. The mobiles came back but was spotty and the landline was still off. I managed to get Aljazeera on another frequency and we were moving from it to Al Arabiya back and forth incredulous at the rapidly deteriorating situation in Libya. At one point there was a breaking news messages that there were airstrikes in a number of areas in Tripoli, I got very angry because I knew for sure this was not happening and I was wondering what is the agenda behind these lies. I received frantic calls from a friend abroad saying she could not reach her family and was it true about the airstrikes. I called them and verified on her behalf that there were no airstrikes in the areas mentioned on TV.
It was also the night the neighbouring guys ran out on the street screaming that Gaddafi had ran away to Venezuela after William Hague's irresponsible statements to news channels. The guys were shouting that "we took 4 days to get rid of Gaddafi", people were celebrating on the street only to be run down soon after. The crackling sound of fire arms on our street was deafening I feared bullets would come through the windows and had the children all lying down. That was a very idiotic statement to make from Hague with regards to a country that is witnessing so much violence. I hold him responsible for many deaths in Tripoli on that evening. This was the night Saif addressed us on TV with a chilling speech about rivers of blood, a civil war etc.... (he was right in a way of course because life as we knew it had definitely ceased to exist).
Most Tripolitanians did not leave their homes from Monday 21st February until Monday 28 February, unless there was something really compelling to do outside or you were trying to demonstrate. Especially after Gaddafi's Zenga Zenga speech on February 22 and his brief appearance with the umbrella around 2 am to negate that he had run away to Venezuela. Obviously whoever tipped Hague did not know Libyans.
The mobile network was very chaotic with no sms and no coverage in certain areas, and spotty coverage in others, still this was the week I received the most international phone calls from all my friends abroad who were appalled at what was going on. I am so grateful that they insisted until they got through because that gave me hope that the world was following the tragedy unfolding in Libya. There was firefighting nightly and airplanes were still going God knew were. Facebook had stopped being accessible along with Twitter a while back. The DSL connection was dead but my Wimax was still ok. We still had satellite TV and I found other frequencies for Aljazeera. It really was not normal anymore, many people died especially on February 25 in Tripoli, when the security forces simply waited for worshippers at the mosques. On Friday 25 February we had security forces parked at each entrance to our street and near each mosque in our street. There were 3 mosques in that street, so you can imagine how many people were killed.What was worse is that we were not allowed to mourn them but only to bury them hurriedly. We could only whisper to each other who died and who was injured, we could not go and visit the bereaved families.

On Monday February 28 I ventured out of the house because I was going crazy at home. I went to visit a friend whose family was from the East to check if they were ok as we were so much worried about them there. I asked her if she saw any reported mercenaries in her street in Ben Ashur and she said no. I asked her where was the place that was bombed from the air and she confirmed there were no airstrikes. So I told her why are people on TV saying that Gaddafi did this? She told me let them lie it's ok anything to get rid of Gaddafi. I told her that damages our cause and credibility. I really was upset about that as I did not want us to lie to be listened to, Gaddafi and his regime had done so much harm that we did not need this to prove how evil they were.

On March 1, I got a call from an unknown number and a woman was screaming at the other end begging for mercy and saying she was a respectable mother and to please leave her alone. I was very frightened as I did not know who it was and what was happening. I tried calling that number afterwards and it was always out of coverage. There is no way to find the owner of the number without getting myself in danger but maybe now I can do that ? I will try. Wimax was credited by LTT for free with one month worth of internet but the connection was touch and go. This was also the day my best friend gave me the tip for the proxy to use Facebook and Twitter.

Blasting the wall of fear and silence in Libya!

2011-08-26T19:39:00.003+02:00

Though Libyans had broken the wall of fear since the first week into the February revolution it is the images of the Libyan people flooding into Bab Al Aziziya barracks and the images of Tripoli residents celebrating in Martyrs' Square (which Gaddafi had rechristened Green Square) that has reinforced the message and finally reassured us that Gaddafi and his regime are down and that Libya has turned a new page.

Along with the wall of fear we are blasting the wall of silence and you know what it is not easy. The fear that wielded silence would prevent us from saying our true opinions except with a trusted number of people no matter what, because any mistake was not only costly to the person who made it but would incur punishment in one form or another on the whole family, and you don't want to be the person to cause that. That was a big part of the fear: hurting others.

I cannot predict how long we can talk freely in Libya and I don't want to be pessimistic, at least not just yet when freedom has been tasted but at least I am sure that we can now talk about the Gaddafi era without the fear of retribution and that in itself is a relief. Which is why I will grab this window of opportunity and take you back to December 2010...

When the riots in Tunis began, I dismissed them as the usual protest that our Tunisian neighbours took too when life gets too difficult, bread, price rise etc… I knew that they have problems because many Tunisians were working in Libya but that they also like to shop here in Tripoli because prices of commodities and merchandise was cheaper. I always wondered how come they could protest against these economic woes without being harassed by the government or without loss of life and praised their courage. But once the turn of events took a dramatic pattern I understood that the Jasmine Revolution was not your run of the mill food riot. I was getting worried about friends there and wondered if Tunisia could descend into warfare and how would this affect Libya?

Then the protest related to housing started in Libya in January and we wondered if that was going to be the spark and how would Gaddafi deal with it ? Well the government did deal with it and outwardly it felt like everything was still business as usual in the Arab world until Saturday 15th January.

I was meeting a business acquaintance for a coffee at one of the new hip restaurants in Tripoli and as we settled down after ordering, he asked me: "what do you think about Zein El Abidin leaving Tunis?", " when did that happen? I was very surprised; apparently the day before Zein had ran away to Saudi Arabia. Though I'd been following the Tunisian revolt, I missed that one important day because I had a social engagement and of course Libyan socializing is famous for being long. I was a bit embarrassed I think for being caught clueless but I found a nice reply. "Sorry, I don't really follow the news anymore, but hey this is much unexpected!" and I changed the subject. It was a bit suspicious to me this question out of the blue, and he seemed well connected so maybe he was not what he projected himself to be? ( remember fear and silence :P).

Zein was followed by Mubarak and the Libyans were ecstatic sending each other jokes and email memes about this and thinking deep down or loudly with trusted people if it could happen in Libya.

I remember a sister in law telling us one evening how she read on a web forum about someone vowing to hang Gaddafi in the Green Square, with a green rope, wearing green clothes and all I could think about is I hope she did not participate in the forum and put her life in danger especially she was using my ISP :P

Then we all saw the calls on Facebook for a day of anger in Libya on February 17 and another one for March 2. To be honest I preferred the March 2 date so that it would have a positive association for all Libyans. I was wondering how it was going to start ? We felt it was brewing for too long and the opposition has been too active lately so something was going to give and knowing Libya and Gaddafi it was going to be brutal.

It began two days earlier than planned on February 15 in Benghazi the fire did not stop there but caught on to the rest of Libya by February 16 the first martyr in the west of Libya had already fallen. and on February 16 I can confirm that protests did take place in Tripoli, I know because I was there and was trying to find a way to get home from a side street. At the same time there were pro-government rallies downtown.

So I knew these were going to be painful but exciting times ahead.

The next day February 17, I was getting my car out of the garage to go to work, it was still dark outside and I could hear voices and see neighbours coming out of the mosque across the street from the morning prayer and as I reversed the car out the headlight caught something scrawled on our wall. I was so scared that I stopped in the middle of the road, I was wondering why where the neighbours not paying any attention and I realised that either they had not seen it because it was dark or that they were purposedly ignoring it :P.

The large graffiti on the wall said in Arabic "Down with Moammar Gaddafi " it was the same on the house to our left and on the building opposite our house. Never before have I seen in Libya anyone dare to do such as thing - seeing it like this in my own street meant for me that really the fear and the silence has been broken down in Libya. I felt scared that Gaddafi's people would see it and harm us, I was sure that other areas in Tripoli had their own talking walls. The atmosphere was really electric.

On my drive into town I decided to check the TV/Radio station it was my barometer for seriousness of situation in Tripoli. As expected the military and anti- aircraft weapons were stationed there already.

As the day unfolded there were a number of anti government demonstration in some parts of Tripoli and notably near the courthouse, again I was planning which route to take back home.

Internet still worked normally on February 17 in Tripoli.

End of Part I

2011-08-22T01:11:00.002+02:00

Message from Tripoli - Libya

Thank you to all who have prayed for us these last months!

Totally bewildered and happy that the nightmare is ending but sad at the loss of life in Libya and among family members.

My immediate family is safe, cat is still alive, house thank God standing even internet is now back alhamdullilah.

So much has happened but now is not the time for stories I need to finally take a proper rest..

I promise to come back if internet holds in the upcoming days.

Best
Highlander

The big pause

2011-04-06T11:45:00.005+02:00

Thank you for asking about me. It's been a long while without internet at least in Tripoli - as far as I know.

A brief tour around the blogs and happy to see that Khadijateri and PH are well and managed to update too.

Not sure from where to start so why don't I share with you what I wrote during this long pause in the form of dated messages? It will help me sharpen my online skills again.
Please keep in mind that these missives are old and that a lot has happened since. Ok here we go...

March 3, 2011

Right now things are a bit confusing, and because of this feeling many of us find it difficult to resume a normal enough life. I’ve been going through the motions mechanically but did not succeed. Part of a normal life is to hurry to the office in the morning and currently many are either 'unemployed' depending on where you worked two weeks ago or still employed but not really sure what to do as your heart is not in it.

I tried to have a schedule, wake up early, have family breakfast, check the news, read a bit on line, and catch up with unfinished business.

But now internet communications means are gone and I have no idea when they will be resumed. So I'm writing these notes out of habit as probably no one will be reading them but myself. I feel like Anne Frank writing her diary... just hoping for a prompt and happier ending.

When your normal life is on pause you try to compensate otherwise. To lighten up the mood I'll attempt to take a humorous side on the situation in conforming to the Arab proverb:

شر البلية ما يضحك

Since this situation might be protracted I thought I’d enumerate to myself the positive points about being on a prolonged ‘vacation’:

No need to use deodorant so your armpits have time to rest and recover from all those chemicals
No need for hair removal, you can rest your skin and then imagine when all this is over how great it would feel to pamper yourself.
No need for sun block, you are not leaving the house anyway so your face can rest and any blemishes can go away naturally you hope
You can use those exfoliation creams you bought at discount price and forgot in your drawer with no fear of sun exposure (see no. 3) and so you will be having radiant skin tone soon.
If you have missed some days in Ramadan then it’s time to fast them, first you save on food and second you loose some weight which is always a plus
You are loosing weight because you don’t have much appetite anyway . So you can look forward to wearing all the hyper fashionable clothes in tiny sizes if anaemia does not strike you first.
Read all the books you bought and never had time to open
Watch all the DVDs you still did not see.
Dedicate time to exercising, I mean you are not going anywhere right? So might as well get those abs back in shape
Catch up with old friends when/if you get out of the house
Last but not least, if you have not had the time to reconnect with your spiritual self, it may be time to do so ...

All in all it’s an 'ahem' golden opportunity, to get some culture, loose weight, shape up and regain your soul.

I'm not being callous, just trying to feel normal....

Crowded mind & those famous assets (updated)

2011-03-02T21:27:00.004+02:00

Now that the mechanism of sanction has actually began, I've lost the last shred of optimism for a prompt resolution...

"The UK has also stopped the export of about £900m worth of new Libyan dinars ordered by state authorities"

If you thought that the past two weeks were painful, the future does not look less tragic, because with this mass freezing of Libyan assets, I'm afraid that the Central Bank will not be able to cover any withdrawing of funds from Libyan citizens, which would result in an economic crisis in the power of purchase. Salaries may not be accessible if there is no liquidity and that would create mass fear.

As I said before, sanctions are inefficient and no one wants foreign intervention.

What is worrying is that Fitch have downgraded us as well. What does that mean? I really don't know, I now wish I'd studied economy or business management or banking, just to understand all this information.

My mind is crowded with frantic thoughts. If someone knows please explain to me the possible economic scenarios that could await us. I understand we have no external debt so why is Fitch downgrading even if our oil production has been halved. Does this mean that we are expected to become another indebted state or any of the countries that receive aid from the IMF? That is more frightening and painful than potential death.

Why? you ask because we cannot run away from death but everything else is possible.

If there is anyone listening please unfreeze those assets!

A morning drive into town

2011-03-01T00:37:00.004+02:00

This morning (Monday) I woke up refreshed from a good night sleep (amazing how the body adapts to outside irritants). Having been scooped up for some time now at home I decided it was time to venture in town and forage for medical supplies for the elderly, stuff for the children and of course cat food. We must not forget our four legged friends who are also suffering in this crisis.

Each member of the family has a specific task, I did not really have to go, but I needed to get out of the house and it seemed like a nice, warmish, sunny and quiet day, I might not have the opportunity again...

It felt strange to dress for the street and not for work, I'd forgotten about jeans and sport shoes. My car was brown coloured from the recent sandstorm. I left our garage cautiously, the street looked normal enough, the only anomaly was me probably.

I drove slowly downtown taking in the sights, lots of activity, lots of cars, women walking, people talking on their cellphones. Some shops open though not all mostly groceries and bakeries. Still eerie though.

It felt like being in another dimension, in a parallel world almost, that is the best I could describe it. Banks were definitely open, in a way that was reassuring, many people were looking busy with a purpose, only I seemed idle, after all I only had some shopping to do. I had to think of practical things from the pharmacy not just medicine, things like shampoo, toothpaste, sanitary items etc.. I even managed to find cat food, and in way felt a sense of achievement.

It is sad that my happiness is now reduced to succeeding in obtaining items. Something that I imagined belonged to the communist era...

Despite all this frenzy of activity in the city, there is a deafening silence. The type of silence that precedes a hurricane. The moment just before the animals in the jungle start running.

There is no running away from destiny. Seen from this vantage point it does not look bright.

I'm a bit depressed today, maybe tomorrow I'll have another story to tell?

2011-02-28T00:19:00.006+02:00

The Presage

I'm tired and stressed out as a result of the current situation that has gripped my country for the last 12 days and of discussing it with friends and strangers all over the globe. I'm tired of the news on TV in which I only see Armageddon, I'm tired of having to update my status when we have a connection so that friends and family know that I am still alive. What happens if I am no longer alive to update it?

I need to switch off and take another approach, perhaps talk about something that has been bothering me for a while now. It may turn out to be relevant to our topic du jour but it would provide some relief from having to think about an unknown future, one where I don't know if would be alive to see it.

Let me take you back to January 2010. On the 21st of that month, I listened online to Hillary Clinton's "Remarks on Internet Freedom" . I remember very well telling myself as noble as this all sounded it was not good. In fact I still have the note to myself that I needed to blog about this because it smacked too much of what I like to call 'modern imperialism' for want of a better world. But the days went by and I did not get out of my blogging hiatus.

However, I also clearly remember telling a friend of mine to mark my words that this date will be the last one in terms of local internet freedoms and will spark something big. She rolled her eyes and laughed at me dismissively.

The very next day You Tube was blocked. Though the disappearance of that website and a couple of others did not really bother me, the significance was immense, it meant that someone now was taking an interest in the Web and that felt uncomfortable in a way, just like having someone watch you undress through a keyhole.

I think it was on that particular day that I felt a foreboding on a number of aspects and my friend had to admit that my hunch was right.

What was it in Mrs Clinton's speech apart from the usual arrogant approach that made my body hair stand? I've picked up the most relevant passages and highlighted words I felt were key. See below:

"[...] The freedom to connect is like the freedom of assembly, only in cyberspace. It allows individuals to get online, come together, and hopefully cooperate. Once you’re on the internet, you don’t need to be a tycoon or a rock star to have a huge impact on society.[...]
On their own, new technologies do not take sides in the struggle for freedom and progress, but the United States does. We stand for a single internet where all of humanity has equal access to knowledge and ideas. And we recognize that the world’s information infrastructure will become what we and others make of it. Now, this challenge may be new, but our responsibility to help ensure the free exchange of ideas goes back to the birth of our republic. [...]

The United States is committed to devoting the diplomatic, economic, and technological resources necessary to advance these freedoms. We are a nation made up of immigrants from every country and every interest that spans the globe. Our foreign policy is premised on the idea that no country more than America stands to benefit when there is cooperation among peoples and states. And no country shoulders a heavier burden when conflict and misunderstanding drive nations apart. So we are well placed to seize the opportunities that come with interconnectivity. And as the birthplace for so many of these technologies, including the internet itself, we have a responsibility to see them used for good. To do that, we need to develop our capacity for what we call, at the State Department, 21st century statecraft. [...]

We are also supporting the development of new tools that enable citizens to exercise their rights of free expression by circumventing politically motivated censorship. We are providing funds to groups around the world to make sure that those tools get to the people who need them in local languages, and with the training they need to access the internet safely. The United States has been assisting in these efforts for some time, with a focus on implementing these programs as efficiently and effectively as possible. Both the American people and nations that censor the internet should understand that our government is committed to helping promote internet freedom. [...]

We want to put these tools in the hands of people who will use them to advance democracy and human rights, to fight climate change and epidemics, to build global support for President Obama’s goal of a world without nuclear weapons, to encourage sustainable economic development that lifts the people at the bottom up. [...]

That’s why today I’m announcing that over the next year, we will work with partners in industry, academia, and nongovernmental organizations to establish a standing effort that will harness the power of connection technologies and apply them to our diplomatic goals. By relying on mobile phones, mapping applications, and other new tools, we can empower citizens and leverage our traditional diplomacy. "

By mid January 2011, Ben Ali was ousted, on February 7, Southern Sudan seceded and by February 11, Mubarak had resigned. I was very happy to see the yoke finally falling from the neck of the neighbouring countries. Then events started developing at such a rapid pace it became very difficult to keep up, Bahrain, Yemen, Libya, Algeria, Syria, Jordan, Morocco, Mauritania etc... it was an epidemic!

Media and thinkers, (but whose media and thinkers?) were quick to label this 'internet revolution' taking from the credit of the people who suffered and died.

My ears were very hot because Mrs Clinton did specifically say 'over the next year' i.e. 2011.

This could be a clue that regardless of the right and wrong of what is happening across the Middle East and North Africa, the legitimate feelings of the people in this swathe of land have been taken advantage of and perhaps manipulated at some point, and I fear they have been/are harnessed for the benefit of Western/US foreign policy.

I am terrified that when all the ashes from the uprisings that are consuming us settle down we become blinded by the celebratory mood and find ourselves having exchanged one agenda for another whose nature would be like an octopus: soft but with many slippery tentacles.

This is not me being a conspiracy theorist, but those familiar with my writing know that I am a big fan of the Realism school in international relations where national interest and security reign king probably with large dollops of personal interest ( that's my addition to the theory :P ).

I don't want to dampen anyone's euphoria but I'm afraid that we will rush in where angels fear to thread. Everybody is feverishly planning and we should not be caught unaware. So to all those involved in state building or re-building; can you please watch out for the wolves in lamb clothes.

2011-02-25T12:00:00.004+02:00

The final showdown?

Apparently today after Friday prayers will be a decisive day! Well we will find out soon enough it's just round the corner in a couple of hours....May God protect Libya.

I don't know what the 'international community' is doing seeing how there does not seem to be any coherent response; and to be honest I'm not expecting much as they should not have to worry about another country anyway.

I've read that the UK and the US where considering a military rescue action for some of their people who may still be stranded. Not sure I'm happy about that, yes they have a right to worry about their own but not to put our life in more jeopardy because of that. I have not heard that the Chinese or the Egyptians or other countries want to storm Libya to rescue their nationals....Not sure what to think these are just ideas I'm stringing here....

I don't look forward to more sanctions on Libya, the last time around it was ordinary people like us who suffered the most. Please UN, US, EU or whoever is considering sanctions can you weigh them carefully so that you don't add to the casualties here. We really don't look forward to be counted among collateral damage....

And one final thing for those who keep saying leave, I'm saying no, this is my country, I refuse to be a refugee! A real Libyan will never run when things get unsavory.

I have this hope that in less than a week we should be OK, just need to weather this storm and all will be well inshallah!

2011-02-22T11:53:00.005+02:00

Week one over, what next ?

First of all I want to thank Dhafer for baby sitting my blog for the past week just in case someone was still reading it; also a heartfelt thank you to those who asked about me.

Secondly seems that internet is more stable today. Not sure what that means and too tired to analyze it or really care anymore...sigh

In a way I believe that living the events is sometimes better than watching them from afar, and while utterly devastated at the loss of life on the ground I have absolutely no means to confirm the numbers. However, I can confirm that all sort of jets have been over the Tripoli airspace, but what they are I cannot identify. Also as I am no expert on ordnance I won't venture any speculation. I have heard explosions and live ammunition but because we do not have many high rise buildings sounds carry far here and so locations are difficult to judge precisely unless you were right there when it happened. All areas of Tripoli have some form of disturbance, the gravity is relative to which strategic hot point is in your neighborhood. One of the more recent posts from PH can perhaps explain it better. Many streets have self made barricades, burning tar barrels etc.. young men are trying to guard their areas with sticks, this is were I wish I had bought a bat when I had the opportunity to. The uncertainty of what form of danger can one be faced with is big factor in keeping the adrenaline running high this is where mistakes can be made when we need to keep a clear head. I thought of rounding up the young men and asking them to help with cleaning some of the mess around but I am sure that in these strange times it will be seen as asking for trouble.

Currently we live one day at a time, you worry about who is shooting at whom, about thugs and criminals ( there are too many after the recent prison releases), you worry about people who will use this situation to their advantage, about war profiteers in basic commodities ( and I have experienced them), about securing medical supplies to children and elderly people, about the possibility of rape and if someone would rescue you or not, about electricity and about being cut off from your family, friends and the world. Dying alone is not fun, dying alone and in a 'dark' loophole without anyone learning about it is worse.

Personally, we are more than 13 souls in this house and that's not counting the pets and it's a challenge at times to ensure everyone does not get on everybody else nerves. I have no news about my aunts, uncle, cousins etc.... because they live in different areas and I can't get them on the phones and none are internet addicts like me. But I am confident that whoever can contact the other first will do so as soon as possible. I may try and drive to where they live today and check on them but not sure it is a safe idea.

Every family in Libya is affected because we are a tight community and because we are a small population. The psychological toll will leave scars and I have not heard anyone in the media offer to help once our trials and tribulations are over, but I'm sure that the non-Arab foreigners who have already left or who are still stuck here will get plenty of psychological support on reaching their homes and I admit that this is somehow irksome to me.

However, Libyans have proven they are a hard nut to crack so inshallah all will be well!

Libya has always been in some way or another a front page news topic and once again we find ourselves in this situation. The world is holding their breath but I'm still not sure if it is caring about the Libyans or simply the cursed oil and the effect that such as crisis is/will be having on the world and honestly just watching all the economic reports makes me lean towards the latter.

Is there danger you ask ? yes but I believe we have reached the point of no return.

What will happen next? I have no idea but and I am praying that the outcome of this situation is to the advantage of our country and its noble people.

Please continue reading the links in my sidebar, they have more updates.

May God help us all.

Highlander

2011-02-20T17:39:00.002+02:00

Incommunicado

This is Dhafer posting; communication is currently spotty and Highlander has asked me to let you know the following:

(1) You are on this blog because you watch or read the news
(2) Despicable rats are jumping ship
(3) It is at times like these when you know who are your friends
(4) Tienanmen Redux ...
(5) Please follow up with those who are updating here (whenever they can) and see my sidebar links, there is a lot to digest and we have a lot on our plate.
(6) For those who care, I am currently relatively safe
(7) To the news outlet who wrote - sorry it is not possible
(8) To my people and country may you always be safe, we are one soul.
(9) Until further notice this is Highlander signing off
(10) This must feel reassuring:
"[..] I do not however conclude that Britain or America or "the west" should be blamed for what is happening now in the Middle East, or should be intervening in some way. [..]" (source: http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/feb/20/libya-protests-oliver-miles)
(11) لا الله الا الله

2011-02-17T19:57:00.002+02:00

Survival and Longevity in the ME and NA

This is a really cool post from Angry Arab

2011-02-14T22:34:00.002+02:00

In memory of abused children in the world!

I've had a lovely childhood which is why when I see a child being abused my blood boils and I try to reason with the parents and find out what is the cause of this... no one wants to watch as a child's spirit, body and life are being gradually destroyed in an inhumane fashion, and when the person doing this harm is someone you know then it is worse especially when the other parent is oblivious and could not care less.

Why do people who don't deserve children have kids?
How to get rid of an abusive parent without allowing them to kill the child out of spite? very dangerous situation.

All your prayers are needed folks to help me save this child.

2011-02-08T04:16:00.002+02:00

RIP Gary Moore

I am very sad to learn that Gary Moore is no more and that I won't have more virtuoso guitar tricks to look forward to.

I have not listened for a while to his albums as you need to be in a special kind of mood for that but he was always one to help me cure the blues.... Maybe it's high time to revisit that driving fast with rock music on ?

2011-01-31T22:05:00.004+02:00

Straight from the heart !

Excerpt one:

"[..]If Egypt's President Hosni Mubarak is toppled, Israel will lose one of its very few friends in a hostile neighbourhood and U.S. President Barack Obama will bear a large share of the blame [..]" (source)

Translation: Leave Mubarak alone as he is keeping us safe we don't really care about anybody or anything else :P

Excerpt two:

"[..]WSJ: And do you think that the West or the US will have less influence or less inability to dictate because of these changes?
President Assad: This is the first time to hear the word 'dictate' from the West because we are called 'dictators,' and a 'dictator' should dictate. [...] (source )
Wall Street Journal not beating around the bush at all :P

2010-04-22T00:30:00.008+02:00

Of 'ashing' and grounding flights: a self imposed sanction

" Flights resume across Europe " was today's headline news. One week of European space closure causes chaos for travelers and business. "International air transport group Iata says the disruption has cost the industry $1.7bn (£1.1bn) and called for European governments to help carriers" continues the article.

But the chaos has affected everyone in different ways, see sample of comments here, and also the 'ash stories' run by the BBC ... people ran out of prescription medication, people were literally under house arrest in Russia because their flight was diverted there and they have no visa. Business trips were canceled. Travelers were stranded at the wrong end of the world and people had to find ingenious ways to make it home: bus, ferry, train, bicycle , taxi, car...Britain even deployed its Royal Navy to repatriate travelers.

That was just one week of no fly zone over a large swath of European airspace, and the toll was enormous materially, morally and physically. How does it compare for people who are forced to endure something similar for years ?

From 1992 till 1999 there was an air embargo on Libya, but even before that there were the US economic sanctions which also affected Libyan airlines - but I won't take that into consideration in my comparison :)

I remember the journeys we had to make just to reach nearby Egypt! By ferry to Malta - 12 hrs in good weather then overnight in a hotel in Malta then if you are lucky you get the next day flight to your destination. But that will not be a direct flight to your destination because not all airlines go everywhere from Malta and you need visas for Europe even in transit. So the next destination for example Cairo and you have to stopover for a night there as well to catch the flight to your final destination. The same thing is for the return journey. You do the maths. This is provided your ferry to Malta is not delayed by bad weather or places are not overbooked. Can you imagine how much all this costs per family?

You had two other options by car to Tunisia ( Djerba or Tunis depending on where you are catching your flight) or by car or bus to the Egyptian border and from there to Cairo. It's ok if you are doing it for fun but who wants to brave the long lines at the border control ? screaming kids, hot tempered people and officials, the journey to the Egyptian border 2- 3 days depending how fast you drive. To Tunis 12 hours non stop. Again if its for your holiday it may be bearable but such a waste of time but if you have a sick person and not everyone lives in Tripoli or Benghazi it's not obvious. Check this . So many car accidents and some many ill Libyans died on the road. I think that was the period when we in Libya started to drive like crazy, because we were always trying to reach somewhere fast enough. Plus the road to Egypt or Tunis was desolate.

If you were abroad you could not guarantee returning on time for your grandfather's funeral, your daughter's birth or your sister's wedding. If you were in Libya you could not guarantee getting your son on time to Jordan for his chemotherapy. The only ones who did not suffer much were foreign oil companies, because they had their drivers take their crew and staff to Djerba to catch flights to Europe. They had no problem at the Tunisian border as foreigners are waived in faster than Arabs. Also this was the time when 1 US$ was equivalent to 3 Libyan Dinars, which meant despite the astronomically rising inflation everything in Libya was cheap for foreigners, so car travel to Tunis in luxurious and safe vehicles was very affordable.

If in one week IATA alone lost 1.7 billion US$, how much was the collective loss for Libya and Libyans in 8 years ? The airline was in shambles and I think will take a long time to recover if at all.

I know how much the gain was for neighbouring countries who benefited from the sanctions on Libya and especially the air embargo. They had to create flights and routes of major airlines and become a hub to cater to Libya travel ( to and fro) and Libya inbound/outbound business in general. I know because I have seen over the years and a short period of time what Malta was and what it became, what Tunis was and what it became and what Egypt was and what it became. I don't say this with resentment though; good for them for seizing an opportunity, they'd be dumb not to use it.

I have seen the same thing happen in Jordan due to the embargo on Iraq.In a decade in the 90s Jordan had radically changed on the outside - this was accelerated more than it normally would have been.

I hope that the world has felt a little bit of what an air embargo means or even what sanctions are and is ready to sympathize with plight of others and not blindly endorse unjust resolutions. After all grounding flights was not a sanction in Europe but it probably felt like one for them as their plans were no longer 100% proof. It probably felt horrible for all those locked up in hotels in foreign countries or in airports without money.... That is a fraction of what Palestinians feel, Libyans and Iraqis experienced, what Iranians could experience and others such as in Cuba feel.

2010-04-04T00:35:00.004+02:00

Avatar and the American Hero Syndrome

I finally managed to watch the much acclaimed Avatar this weekend, not in 3 or 2 D as we no longer have this type of cinema in Libya but simply on DVD.

I absolutely loved the movie, the plot and the Na'vi are beautiful creatures, I wish I could lead such a life.
The angle that most appealed to me is caring about the planet, a climate or environment type of storyline which also includes balance between nature and the spirit.

Prior to watching the film I had read some criticism that it may be anti-American as it negatively criticizes mechanized warfare and by extension the US led wars on Iraq and Afghanistan and possibly all the other attacks launched on other countries to shock and awe them into submission.

Having seen and enjoyed the creativity of the production, I can confirm that it is certainly not anti-American but on the contrary as is with 99.999 % of US films it manages to portray the person who at the end saves the world as American. Even in Avatar this did not fail because the only one who could save the Na'vi was an US marine who like many people in the military in countries who experienced war with the US dated a local woman. That's why fraternization with the natives are frowned upon in the military, use the woman for sex but don't fall in love with them because you may end up embracing their cause and going against your nation even if your nation is in the wrong :P.

Anyway the hero fell in love with the heroine and helped her people against his people. If not for him the American, the Na'vi would be annihilated.

That is the subliminal message I got, 100% pro - America :)

Now we in the Arab world should start making more movies where an Arab saves the day. If Bollywood, the Israelis and even Egyptian film producers can do it why not the rest ? we just need a bit of more fervent nationalism !

Will definitely watch the movie again...

2010-03-07T22:32:00.004+02:00

Owning my dream car at last !

After 4 years of dreaming and 32 comments about my dream car, I am finally the proud owner of the Toyota Highlander 2010 ....

Funnily enough owning my dream car has not filled my heart with the happiness I imagined back in 2006...why is that do you reckon? is it getting old? different preoccupations? or have I still not shaken the moody clouds that have gripped me since the saddest Eid of all?

I think it's probably the latter as I have not written about it yet.

Meanwhile that SUV is causing terror on the road.

Type rest of the post here

2010-02-20T20:59:00.006+02:00

John Stack: Tax Martyr or Tax Terrorist ?

'Pilot crashes into Texas building': I know it's oldish news - so last week right ? But when I saw this title on the news last week and this type of footage (source for photo on right) on TV with another American building on fire...I confess I was waiting for the word 'Arab' and 'Muslim' to spring up, not because this is what people who belong to this classification do best but because the world has become accustomed to hearing this connection from media whenever something happens :)

Imagine my 'joy' on hearing that it's only a 'white' guy who did this... and he is alleged to have stated on his website that "Violence not only is the answer, it is the only answer..." very balanced indeed. So John Stack went ballistic because of taxes !

I have yet to see hatred towards him or any reaction from the world, in fact he is not newsworthy anymore...but he did crash a plane into a building right ? so does this count as terrorism? Will his family members and neighbours be forever labeled with shame? I would like to know his religion- why is that not mentioned ? Or maybe soon we will hear that he was visiting a mosque, had traveled to Yemen and was donating money to a 'madrasa' in Pakistan.

I dread to think what would happen if he turned out to have had even bought a Shawarma or Falafel or eaten Couscous within the last 10 years :) * Can you imagine the scenario?

Sigh I guess it's just the double standards as usual .

* Or maybe not? because these are claimed to be favourite staples by Israelis , but this post is not about them :P so if you want to read more check Anglo Libyan's blog !

2010-02-18T14:52:00.005+02:00

Surviving and Living as a preventative measure

" Dragan doesn't want to go to Italy. He misses his wife and son, but he isn't Italian and he never will be. There is no country he can go to where he won't be from Sarajevo. This is his home, and this is the city he wants to be in. He doesn't want to live under siege for the rest of his life, but to abandon the city to the men on the hills would mean that he would be forever homeless. As long as he's here, and as long as he can keep his fear of death from blinding him to what's left of a world he once loved and could love again, then there's still hope that one day he will be able to walk openly down the streets of this city with his wife and son, sit in a restaurant and eat a meal, browse the windows of shops, free from the men wit guns." [p.161 - Atlantic Books London - 2008]

" [..] civilisation isn't a thing that you build and then there it is, you have it forever. It needs to be built constantly, recreated daily [...] As long as there's war, life is a preventative measure." [p216 - Atlantic Books London - 2008]

Having recently completed reading " The Cellist of Sarajevo", I noticed how the mosaic of emotions, ideas and representations recounted in the novel could be applied to any war torn country but the excerpt from page 161 simply screamed Palestine. I salute the Palestinian people for their steadfastness!

I highly recommend this book, it is gripping, and the best part is that the author, Steven Galloway did not use labels such as Serb, Muslim etc..

2010-02-12T09:12:00.005+02:00

Morality vs Security: a long time dilemma

Guantanamo and Abu Ghraib, both brainchildren of the military adventure of a Western democracy into a far away land are the events which have brought to the forefront of the news the ethics of prisoner treatment and professional interrogation techniques.

That Britain and the US can discuss these topics 'democratically', disclosing and admitting at times that a terrible injustice may have been dealt to inmates and undertaking a few reforms here and there is admirable and is perhaps the reason why they feel they are able to lecture and train other 'less advanced' countries on international prison management standards in penitentiary institutions.

However, I find it hard to believe that anyone in the world is naive enough to think that there is something called 'good condition of imprisonment', or that there is no abuse in a prison environment. Even in an experimental environment there is large scope for mismanagement of inmates. I may have probably mentioned the Stanford experiment before but I find it fascinating, as this is human nature and the human nature given the right set of circumstances can transform an individual or individuals en masse into 'willing perpetrators or victims of evil'.

Knowing all this why would anyone be shocked at the latest emerging news about the post 9/11 world in which MI5 is accused of covering up the 'alleged' torture of " Ethiopian-born Mr Mohamed, 31[..] at the behest of US authorities after his detention in Pakistan in 2002. [...]The MPs said allegations that MI5 officers were "careless in their observance of their obligations towards the human rights of detainees"".

If people are wiling to hurt their own kind in ordinary/civilian prison environments, what do you think happens if they are given the authority over people from a different colour, religion and country than their own and especially in the context of war on terror ?

Come on let's be real ...what lies beneath in any prison system or non system on any spot on earth is worse than even our wildest dreams. Any one doing time is not rehabilitated but probably would not want to go back there simply from fear. Fear is what conditions one to keep remaining a willing victim or take the alternative path and seek vengeance.

So people stop thinking that morals in the west are higher and then feel outraged about rendition or anything else. This is all standard and 'normal' procedure in matters of national security..... and abuse is and will always be normal in any system where individuals will have any authority over anyone.

2010-02-11T00:43:00.003+02:00

Returning to the roots: a hardcore Highlander post

"Palestinian resistance and persistence is growing fierce rather than weakening. As an IDF intelligence general predicted already at the first Intifada. ‘In order to win, all Palestinians have to do is to survive’. They survive and they are indeed winning."

Read the above on a blog last year and came across again today.

Type rest of the post here

2010-02-07T23:53:00.004+02:00

The Wolf and the Vampire

Just finished watching New Moon !

Being loved by a werewolf AND a vampire has been my teenage fantasy.
This movie made me feel 16 again... I can't make up my mind who I want : Jacob or Edward? They symbolizes two types of extremely attractive males....

I think I will be buying the books soon to relish the feeling...

2010-01-09T22:29:00.001+02:00

Fortuitous Arab / Muslim Terrorism: is there an oil connection?

I feel very sorry for the victims of terrorists attacks from whichever nation and creed, but I sometimes find it strange that in 99% of cases the western intelligence agencies always let the alleged bad guy slip yet at the same time he/she is caught by sheer luck or the 'bravery' of a civilian and this always happen at a time when it is most needed in the US.

Conspiracy you cry ? well why not if you have read so far ....some alternative opinion to ponder on and what's oil got to do with it? I thought the following was interesting

"The Underwear Bomber": Crushing Freedom With Phony Arab Terrorism

by Joe Quinn [source] I'm repasting the whole article in case you are too lazy to read :)

Strange as it may seem, a couple of weeks ago as I ruminated on Obama's broken promise to bring the troops home, his attempt to out-warmonger the Bush administration and his plummeting popularity, I thought to myself: "ya know, what that guy (or rather the disgruntled US public) needs is a good old fashioned 'Muslim terror attack'. Preferably one that includes a ranting 'terrorist' message about Afghanistan and 'slaughtering infidels'. That'll soon silence the rabble and get them behind Obama's Afghan surge!"

And so it was that, as I sipped my eggnog on Christmas day, I was shockingly unsurprised to read the headlines about an 'underwear bomb'

To adequately address the recent airline "terror attack" in Detroit and the airborne terror attacks in Yemen we must delve into the topsy turvey world of the 'war on terror', where black is white, up is down, and shady Middle Eastern-looking men and your knickers share equal rating on the US DHS threat-o-meter. In short, it's no easy task. So first of all, let me say a few words about airports and the old and new airport "security measures".

The nightmare that is modern commercial air travel started with 9/11. Before this date, air travel was reasonably civilized. There were no long queues (at least not after check in). We just threw our hand luggage on the security belt, walked through the scanner and we were done.

After 9/11 however, every commercial airplane became a potential flying bomb and passengers and their hand luggage had to undergo more extensive searches. In Dec 2001, the theatrics of the clearly brain-washed Richard Reid, aka "the shoe bomber", added the common or garden shoe to the list of potential terrorist weapons. Now, the equally bizarre antics of the young Nigerian Mr Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab has thrown our underwear into the mix.

Both shoe and knicker bomber attempted to use PETN (a military explosive) on their respective flights. As a result, our shoes now go through scanners at airports and I can only presume that more invasive scanning of our lower torsos will also be mandated supposedly in an effort to prevent further knicker attacks. The problem, however, is this:

PETN, either in shoes or strapped to any part of the body, cannot be detected by airport scanners. A chemical test is needed. Unless authorities plan to drastically reconfigure the number and availability of international flights, there is no chance that chemical tests can be introduced for every passenger. Hence we reach our first tentative conclusion: that the billions of shoes that have been scanned at airports since 2001, and the billions of pairs of underwear that will henceforth become objects of official scrutiny, have and will have had nothing to do with airport security or preventing terrorism.

So what's it all about?

Follow me now, as I metaphorically wade through the vast piles of manure that constitute the raw material for the official story of the latest 'terror attack'.

The Christmas knicker bomber was not your usual disgruntled Arab or lowly Muslim acolyte. He was the son of Nigerian banking mogul and former Nigerian government minister Alhaji Umaru Mutallab, one of the richest men in Africa. We're talking one of the African colonial elite here, an African version of the British "old boy's network" While in London, his son, the knicker bomber lived in a ₤4 million apartment in Mansfield Street, in the city's West End.

It is not surprising therefore to learn that the knicker bomber apparently received special treatment at Amsterdam airport before he boarded his flight to Detroit. Eyewitness Kurt Haskell reported that a sharply dressed Indian man escorted him to the gate and told the attendant that the knicker bomber had no passport but needed to get on the flight. The sharply dressed man was told that he would have to speak to the manager, which he apparently did and successfully got the young 'terrorist' on board.

Now this requires some serious string pulling, and all the hoopla in the press about whether or not the security system worked is just hubris, because if the knicker bomber appeared at the gate without a passport, it is unlikely that he went through the normal process up to that point, including check-in which requires passengers to show their passports. In all probability he was escorted as a VIP to the gate by the sharply dressed man. So how do two suspicious looking terrorists, at least one of them without a passport, get to the gate in an airport and then onto the flight? The answer is they don't unless they have some diplomatic credentials or high-level contacts in the airport.

Guess who runs the security at Amsterdam Schipol airport? ICTS of course! the same Israeli owned security company that somehow managed to let the shoe bomber on his Miami flight in 2001 and several of those mythical hijackers who allegedly flew out of Boston's Logan airport on 9/11. It is also useful to remember that the shoe bomber was cleared through ICTS and El Al security at Amsterdam airport on a flight to Tel Aviv in July 2001 for what was apparently an all-expenses paid week-long trip to the Israeli city. What precisely he did there remains a mystery.

All of which leads us to our second tentative conclusion:

The knicker bomber and his handler were not terrorists. Of course, it all depends on who you think the real terrorists are...

Moving on to the bomb itself; as mentioned it was PETN, or rather Pentaerythritol, which is a building block for PETN. To make PETN, Pentaerythritol must be mixed with concentrated nitric and sulfuric acids. It is assumed that these acids were in the syringe that the knicker bomber was attempting to inject, under the cover of a blanket, into his underpants. He then attempted to ignite the newly prepared PETN with some kind of a fuse. He was apparently unaware that PETN requires a shock wave rather than heat or flame to detonate, and a shock wave is best provided by an initiator explosive. In short, the whole enterprise was doomed to failure from the beginning. Since the bomber and his smartly-dressed handler were able to get to the gate without passports, and are unlikely to have passed through security, we are left to ponder why the bomber didn't carry an explosive that required much less preparation, like a half a stick of dynamite for example. Here's a short video of what a half stick of dynamite does to a file cabinet.

Tentative conclusion number three therefore is that the goal was not to actually 'kill infidels' but rather to reinforce the concept of 'Muslim terrorism'. In fact, it seems clear at this stage that the combining of terrorism and commercial air travel is a specific tactic by the real terror masters to maximise fear. After all, it is difficult to think of a place where the average citizen already feels more vulnerable than on a metal tube hurtling through the air at 35,000 feet. Add in a wild-eyed 'terrorist' and you have the optimal psychological conditions for fear-based programming.

In this particular case however, the knicker bomber was far from wild-eyed. According to the first passenger who attempted to subdue Mutallab on the plane, he offered no resistance and was docile. He was "staring into nothing" according to Dutch 'film maker' Jasper Schuringa. Schuringa also noted that Mutallab was actually on fire but showed no reaction whatsoever. This is suggestive of someone who is in some sort of trance. Indeed, Schuringa stated this explicitly in this interview but immediately followed it with the words, "I don't want to talk about that."

How very strange.

Equally strange is Schuringa's account of how he subdued Mutallab:

as the plane neared its destination of Detroit, Michigan, he heard a pop that sounded like a firecracker going off, and someone started yelling: "Fire! Fire!"

"Around 30 seconds later the smoke started to fill up on the left side beneath this person," he said.

"I basically reacted directly. I didn't think."

He jumped over the passenger next to him and lunged over Abdulmutallab's seat, "Because I was thinking he's trying to blow up the plane, and I was trying to search his body for any explosives."

"I pulled the object from him and tried to extinguish the fire with my hands and threw it away,"

"Just to be sure I grabbed him with another attendant and we took him to first class and there we stripped him and contained him with handcuffs and we made sure he had no more weapons, no more bombs on him."

"The whole plane was screaming. The suspect, he didn't say a word."

Schuringa said other passengers applauded as he walked back to his seat.

The reactions of the other passengers seems normal. The reactions of Schuringa are reminiscent of someone who has been trained in anti-in-flight-terror tactics.

According to reports Schuringa was on his way to visit an 'Israeli friend', Shai Ben-Ami who owns a restaurant in Miami. The flight landed at around noon on Christmas day, and by that afternoon Ben-Ami had become Schuringa's impromptu PR manager, aggressively negotiating fees for interviews and the couple of cell phone pictures that Schuringa had taken of Mutallab as he was being taken off the plane.

Eyewitnesses on the flight also reported that after Mutallab was taken off the plane the FBI arrested another Indian-looking man in Detroit airport. The FBI has since denied that anyone else was involved.

Patricia Keepman was on the flight with her husband, daughter and two new adopted children from Ethiopia. She reported that they were sitting about 20 rows behind Mutallab. Her daughter said that ahead of them was a man who videotaped the entire flight, including the attempted detonation. "He sat up and videotaped the entire thing, very calmly," said Patricia. "We do know that the FBI is looking for him intensely. Since then, we've heard nothing about it."

Passenger Kurt Haskell also reported that a third Indian man was arrested after the plane landed in Detroit airport. Haskell also claims that he has since been visited by the FBI in what appears to be an attempt to silence him and his report of a third man.

According to CNN, the knicker bomber's father contacted the U.S. Embassy in Nigeria recently with concerns his son was planning something, that he had become "radicalized". His pleas apparently fell on deaf ears.

Coincidentally, the Orwellian Patriot Act, passed on the back of the 9/11 attacks, is up for either renewal or trash-canning in a couple of weeks. What luck then for Obama, who is secretly very fond of such draconian powers, that the knicker bomber happened along, because there is now a very good chance that the Patriot Act will not only be enthusiastically renewed, but unanimously so.

There is no chance however that any of these troubling details will be discussed by the mainstream media, because none of them are relevant to the story that the US and Israeli governments want us to believe: Yemen is crawling with "al-Qaeda"!!

Going Global

Initially, all we had was a Nigerian youth and a misguided effort to detonate what we are told was an explosive compound. Within 24 hours however, IntelCenter, a group of US ex-military and intelligence officials who over the years have somehow managed to produce many of the "al-Qaeda" videos and messages that they serendipitously find on "jihadist websites", produced a picture of Mutallab with what they claim is the flag of the media arm of "al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula" and a message from the group claiming Mutallab as one of their own:

"We tell the American people that since you support the leaders who kill our women and children ... we have come to slaughter you (and) will strike you with no previous (warning), our vengeance is near," the statement said.

Scared yet? Well, the people at Intelcenter really hope you are. They put a lot of effort into producing these messages and videos and images. For example, a 2006 'al-qaeda' video featuring al-Zawahiri released by Intelcenter was analyzed by Neal Krawetz, a researcher and computer security consultant. During a presentation he gave at the BlackHat security conference in Las Vegas in 2007 about analyzing digital photographs and video images for alterations and enhancements, Krawetz showed that the video had been altered in a very interesting way.

Using a program he wrote (and provided on the conference CD-ROM) Krawetz could print out the quantization tables in a JPEG file (that indicate how the image was compressed) and determine the last tool that created the image - that is, the make and model of the camera if the image is original or the version of Photoshop that was used to alter and re-save the image.

Krawetz took an image (above) from the 2006 video of al-Zawahiri showing the Mr Magoo look-alike sitting in front of a desk and banner with writing on it. After conducting his error analysis Krawetz was able to determine that the writing on the banner behind al-Zawahiri's head was added to the image afterward and at the same time as the logo of IntelCenter, which released the video. In short, it seems very likely that IntelCenter produced the writing on the banner, and probably the entire video, from whole cloth.

Despite this evidence, we are being asked to believe that the latest message and photo from 'al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula' that IntelCenter just happened to find on a "Jihadist internet message board" that links Mutallab with 'al-Qaeda in Yemen' is authentic!

The Yemen government, or rather dictatorship, added its voice to the subterfuge by claiming that Mutallab was in Yemen from August to December 2009. Dodgy internet postings, as usual from unnamed 'jihadist web sites' would have us believe he was putting the final touches to his knicker bomb under the tutelage of "al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula" and specifically Anwar al-Awlaki, the US born Muslim lecturer, spiritual leader, and former imam. The very same al-Awlaki who allegedly corresponded with Fort Hood mind-programmed patsy Nidal Malik Hasan. The very same al-Awlaki who was allegedly the spiritual adviser to two of the 9/11 hijackers. Isn't it just wonderful how it all connects together in one giant web of "Muslim terrorism" that starts with 9/11?

The fact is, it all does start with 9/11, and the evidence that the 9/11 attacks were perpetrated by elements of the US and Israeli governments is so abundant that no further discussion is required. How Mutallab actually passed his time in Yemen is however still open to speculation, and speculation is always best when some reasonably objective data is marshaled to back it up. Data like:

Yemen seizes 'Israel-linked' cell

Tuesday, 7 October 2008
BBC News

Yemeni President Ali Abdullah Saleh has said the security forces have arrested a group of alleged Islamist militants linked to Israeli intelligence.

Mr Saleh did not say what evidence had been found to show the group's links with Israel, a regional enemy of Yemen.

The arrests were connected with an attack on the US embassy in Sanaa last month which killed at least 18 people, official sources were quoted saying.

Israel's foreign ministry has rejected the accusation as "totally ridiculous".

"A terrorist cell was arrested and will be referred to the judicial authorities for its links with the Israeli intelligence services," Mr Saleh told a gathering at al-Mukalla University in Hadramawt province.

"Details of the trial will be announced later. You will hear about what goes on in the proceedings," he added.

The 17 September attack was the second to target the US embassy since April. Militants detonated car bombs before firing rockets at the heavily fortified building.

Mr Saleh did not identify the suspects, but official sources were quoted saying it was the same cell - led by a militant called Abu al-Ghaith al-Yamani - whose arrest was announced a week after the attack.

The simple yet ugly truth is that Yemen is now squarely in the cross-hairs of the US imperial juggernaut. As to the reason why, we may need only look to the following report from Feb 2009:

Yemen oil majors mull investments

Yemen's Ministry for Oil and Mineral Resources has received eight oil investment bids from international companies, pan-Arab daily al-Hayat quoted Aidarous as saying, four of which were from oil majors seeking direct negotiations with Yemen.

The companies include Exxon Mobil, Total, and BP, the minister said, but did not elaborate on the nature of the investments.

Yemen also has significant natural gas reserves that are in the process of being explored and extracted by French Multi-national Total. But perhaps Yemen's most strategically important asset is its location. Sitting on the southern tip of the Arabian peninsula, the Yemeni sea port of Aden and the gulf of Aden in general is ideally located for the transport of the two aforementioned crucially important commodities. Over 30% of all crude oil and over 10% of global trade pass through the Gulf of Aden and control of it gives control over shipping in the region (think piracy) and access to the coasts of oil-rich East African nations like Somalia and Sudan.

With climate change, in the form of a glacial rebound or a new 'ice age', and the massive world-wide social unrest it would cause, looking increasingly likely in the near future, the psychopathic elite are undoubtedly eager to ensure their own comfortable survival at our expense.

Yemen - Yesterday And Today

Yemen has only existed as an independent country for less than 50 years. During and after the Second World War, Aden was regarded as the key to the defense of British imperial interests in the Middle East, the Gulf and the Indian Ocean. As late as May 1956 a British junior minister, Lord Lloyd, stated that "for the foreseeable future it would not be reasonable or sensible or in the interests of the colony's inhabitants to aspire to any aim beyond that of a considerable degree of internal self-government."1 Naturally enough, Yenemis were less than enthusiastic about being indefinitely subservient to the British.

Historically, Yemen had been split into two governates, North and South Yemen. In 1956, as long as its then ruler Imam Ahmed did not interfere, the British were willing to allow North Yemen relative independence. South Yemen however was to remain fully British, at least economically. In response to an increasingly powerful trade union movement made up of the Arab working class who demanded better wages, living standards and infrastructure, the British attempted to consolidate their control in the South by establishing the Federation of South Arabia in 1959, a ramshackle affair made up of the various emirs, sheiks and sultans who were willing to side with the British against Yemeni nationalist aspirations in exchange for position and wealth.

British Petroleum had established an oil refinery in 1954 and the wealth that this resource could and should have provided for the Yemeni people was instead shipped out to further British strategic interests elsewhere in the world, leaving much of Yemen's population impoverished. While the British governing elite have always (and still do) view all (or rather most) non-Western peoples as little more than howling savages, like so many other colonized nations, the Yemeni people had no trouble recognizing the injustice of the situation. Faced with an increasingly militant nationalist movement within both South and North Yemen, the British reacted to the justified grievances of a mobilized civilian population in the only way they know how - subterfuge and force.

After a wave of strikes called by the Aden Trades Union Congress (how dare they!) which were followed by mass arrests, beatings and torture by the British military, a number of activists and organizations from Aden and outlying areas came together to establish the National Liberation Front for Occupied South Yemen or the NLF for short. The leaders were middle class... clerks, teachers, officers.2 To deal with the insurgents ('terrorists' in modern parlance), the British decided on the tried and trusted method of terrorizing the local population. They proclaimed the insurgent areas 'proscribed areas' and dropped leaflets telling the inhabitants to leave (does this remind you of the tactics of a certain Middle Eastern country in January 2009?). With that formality completed the Royal Air Force freely rocketed and bombed the areas, strafing any sign of human activity. Crops were destroyed, livestock seized and houses blown up, (again, does this remind you of anything?) When Yemeni farmers began to work their fields at night, the British military added night-time bombing.3

Search operations were carried out on a large scale in an attempt to restrict movement of men and weapons by the NLF. Inevitably, these searches accompanied by racists abuse and physical manhandling further alienated the population. Stephen Harper, the Daily Express correspondent in Aden, wrote fondly of the troops that "there's a lot of boot, gun-butt and fist thumping" but that this wasn't brutality but rather "righteous anger". An officer recalled how, when troops were banned from calling the Arabs 'wog', they wittily responded by calling them 'gollies' instead14 (see here for the origin and usage of the world golliwog). The counter-productivity of such abuse always was (and still is) lost on the British political elite and military and obviously did nothing to win the 'hearts and minds' of the Yemeni people in their rebelling against foreign domination.

Another tactic used by the British military (you may recognize this one) was the deployment of 'Special Branch Sections'. These were eight to ten man mobile patrols with an officer in command. Dressed up as Arabs they carried out raids, searches and attacks against British and Yemeni civilian and military targets that could then be blamed on the insurgents in an effort to justify the British oppression. The SAS in its first official deployment against urban guerillas was also deployed in 'Keeni Meeni' squads (a Swahili term appropriately meaning 'slithering snakes'). 'Keeni Meeni' members were SAS men thought most likely to be able to pass for Arabs...5

Without intelligence sources within the local Arab population, British military leaders settled on the inspired idea that torture of prisoners was the next best thing. This mainly involved beatings of one form or another but also sensory deprivation techniques that would later be used in the 30 years dirty war in Northern Ireland and more recently in Iraq and Afghanistan.

At the time, allegations of torture and brutality were made in the British press against the Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders, an infantry regiment of the British Army. The conviction of members of the regiment in 1981 for the brutal murder of two catholic farmers in Northern Ireland in 1972 led to revelations about events in Yemen. The Glasgow Sunday Mail reported that it had:

conducted a careful and comprehensive investigation including the sworn statements of a dozen soldiers and officers detailing murder and robbery of local Arabs. A single soldier admitted shooting dead five unarmed Arab civilians in different incidents. Several others said they used morphine injections to kill captives. Others claimed to be witnesses to the bayonetting to death of a Arab teenager whose only crime was to be found in a cafe after curfew.6

Eventually, the British were forced out of Yemen (at least physically) and the two kingdoms of North and South Yemen were formally united as the Republic of Yemen on May 22, 1990. Yemen's complicated history since British withdrawal and the unification of the North and South is beyond the scope of this article. Nevertheless, even a brief analysis of the social and political history of Yemen over the past 50 years is enough to show that the vast majority of internal conflicts have been over one single issue - civil rights and the desire of normal people to live a dignified existence free from oppression and inequality. When such aspirations conflict (as they invariably do) with the 'geo-strategic' interests of world powers like the US, Britain, or the megalomaniacal pseudo-religious and racist ideals of the state of Israel, normal people lose. 100 years ago, the British elite could simply crush such popular uprisings and explain it away as just the fall-out from their munificent efforts to civilize a 'backward people'. Today however, it is not so easy to fool a somewhat more enlightened world public and a more convincing argument must be made. That argument is today called "the world-wide terrorist threat".

In Yemen today, the people that the US, British and Israeli governments claim are "Muslim terrorists", "al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula", 'al-Qaeda in Yemen" etc. etc. are in fact local tribesmen and their families who are clamoring for social justice and have been doing so for several decades. They would very probably be easily enticed to put down their arms if they were given economic help and simple concessions such as roads and schools by the government. But that is too much to ask of either the global power brokers or Yemen's puppet government. To give any power to the people is, in the twisted, greed-driven minds of the global elite, the first step on the road to the loss of control, and control over normal human beings and our planet is the lifeblood of our corrupt and psychologically deviant leaders.

And so we are led back to the knicker bomber who, we are told, was trained by Muslim terrorists in Yemen. In response to this bogus threat (and indeed before it even appeared) the US military (and it's Saudi Arabian allies), like the British military before them, have been bombing, rocketing and strafing, not 'al-Qaeda in Yemen', but ordinary Yemeni civilians and tribesmen who dared to raise their voices, fists and guns against imperial and domestic injustice.

2010-01-01T23:23:00.000+02:00

Highlander & 2009

2009 was a very special year to me despite the Eid Al Adha fiasco which we will revisit soon but not today…

Last year witnessed some major changes on a personal scale, for the first time in decades New Year resolutions formulated at the start of the year have been fulfilled and are ongoing.

How many of you have stuck to your new year resolutions?

Out of five resolutions, I have undertaken four and have started planning the fifth. I succeeded in three and though the fourth was a failure, I count it as successful also because I broke the ice and did it. This means there is nothing to stop me trying again now. Number 5 is the path to the spirit …

I think that’s why regardless of the bad moments I still feel great and elated. Yes I do…. I am fitter and healthier than I have been for a long time.

2009 began sadly with the loss of our wonderful cat ; but shortly after I’ve met with my best friend in London and we enjoyed every minute; a visit that will be forever engraved in my memory. I met another great friend in Libya and it was such fun seeing him again.

This is the year were more friendships were hatched but others were lost, but this is the first time I no longer feel sad about lost friends because if they were friends they would not be gone. In fact what brought it home was a status message on Facebook “ I have trimmed my list of friends today” and one comment said “ I guess I made it”, well I made it too obviously because I was reading the message and the comments but it opened my eyes that I needed to do a major inventory in my own life. My address book was overflowing and sometimes I could no longer put a face to a name. So there has been an overhaul in that area too, and you know what ? It did not hurt one bit !!!! guess it gets easier with age or is it with maturity?

Did you revise your friendship database ?

This is the year I bought my own house, I don’t live in it but it’s still mine !

How many of you own your own house without being in debt?

I visited unexplored lands and revisited some old favourites.

Did you travel in 2009 and where ?

This is the year Highlander has stopped being starry eyed at work and is now very much office politics savvy. There is no stopping me and the sky’s the limit….

What are your feelings about your job ?

2009 brought a lot of blessings, parents and siblings and nieces and nephews are good despite a close call at a certain period. Hamdillah I am satisfied and grateful!

The year literally ended beautifully! Though the ONE is not yet here, it came as a surprise to be asked in marriage by someone who was born when I was in high school.

Did I accept the offer? Read on to find out .. He is Libyan, young, handsome, smart and has a good job, he has a house and a farm (Libyans will know what I mean), and his mum actually likes me. No he does not speak English and I never met him before but apparently he has been watching me and following me for a couple of months and he just thought I was full life and so cute (his words!). Then he spoke to a common friend of the family who told my mum. My mum told me and I agreed to see him. Then his mother made the first visit to us at home. The second visit he came with her and the common family friend to speak with me. He did not believe me when I told him my age, yet decided to still go ahead with the proposal. For a Libyan man this is surprising but also flattering to me. Because knowing Libyan guys they always go for the youthful pretty face. Even a 25 year old would want his wife to be a minimum of 5 years younger, while guys in their 40s were marrying girls straight from high school. The only exception would be if she was rich and loved him then it would be a marriage of convenience for him.

But I told him, I don’t think it’s a good idea, maybe your immediate family won’t mind but the society would not leave you alone. He told me the Prophet PBUH married Lady Khadija and she was way older than him? Yes that’s true but I would not want something that started so sweetly to end as another statistic. You like me now and think I would probably be a great wife for you. But at some point I will grow old and will stop looking like this and you will still be young. Also we do not share the same interest that would bond us, our pasts are different, I could relate to your things, but you will not be able to relate to mine. Everything is kismet and nasseeb and yours and mine will come someday!

Do you feel and act your ‘supposed’ age?

My friends of course think I blew a good catch, but I don’t think so, you know why?

My ego was over the moon, it meant that right now I looked as I did back in high school, I know that’s narcissist but I would indeed be a hypocrite if I did not say I enjoyed the attention. It was also lovely that he still wanted me after knowing my real biological earth age.

That was God’s masterstroke, a grand finale to an interesting year. God has indeed mysterious ways but he sure knows how to get his message across!
His message was beautiful and full of mercy. It has shown me that if I had for any moment lost confidence in anything, He was watching out for me. I realised that what I thought were wrongs were merely thorns that prickled because I allowed them. What do you do with thorns, you remove them and throw them away and that was that. The little graze is not even worth a second look !

Welcome 2010! This is the year where I hope to visit God’s House, this is the year where I don’t have any resolutions because I have achieved them all. As for wishes we all have them but I won’t tell you mine those are secret and only the Most Merciful knows them.

Happy New Year
Love
Highlander

2009-12-25T23:34:00.001+02:00

Christmas, Islamic New Year and a very a sad Eid

It's Christmas today! Around this time of the year I usually wish my friends who observe this feast a Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays to my American friends whose political correctness has rubbed a little on me because they actually feel uncomfortable when you openly congratulate them on Christmas. But funnily enough if they are Jews then they expect you to acknowledge that – no political correctness there – in fact they would tell me straight – I'm Jewish. Almost making you feel guilty that somehow you offended them. I'm never offended if someone wishes me Merry Christmas or Shana Tova, 99.9% of the time the non-Arabs that I know be it in business or a more friendly settings do never wish me a Eid Mabrouk or even Happy Eid and I don't really take offense but I'm revising my attitude and as I said above; from now on I will only bother about those who have actually at one point or another shown some attention. A few occasions will be coming up and those would be my yardstick – just give the same treatment, no longer trying to be better :).

Well this weekend it's Christmas and last weekend was Hijri New Year, no one brought this up on the Libyan blogosphere except for OTE , I think (thank you), and Happy New Hijri Year to Muslims on a global scale. This New Year dawned on me discreetly again some wondered which day it would be exactly, just like the Eid Adha this year 2009.

Flashback to older posts:" this feast is the most important one in the Islamic world. If they are not performing Hajj or pilgrimage to Mecca than the majority of Muslims will sacrifice a sheep on the first day and distribute most of it to the poor people. But the Eid is also very much a family day. Muslims go in the morning to the special Eid prayer and when it ends they return home in processions chanting Allahu Akbar (God is Great [.this is the Takbir.] After the prayers, the families who are making a sacrifice in honour of the Jewish Prophet Abraham who was ordered to prove his faith by sacrificing his own son and who was saved from doing this at the last minute by God.[…] However the Eid is only the culmination of the period of the pilgrimage or Hajj".

This year's Eid Adha was like no other, I was in a Mulsim country but could not hear the Takbir. On entering Mecca the Takbir was recited by the Muslims, and when I hear it on the Eid I am so overwhelmed that my skin tingles and my heart squeezes and I feel the faith being renewed in my soul.

I have not recovered since from this melancholic feeling.. I call it the saddest Eid of all and if you want to know why then come back to read me in couple of days…

2009-12-05T12:21:00.003+02:00

When in trouble we are all brothers and sisters

"People aren't overcome by situations or outside forces; defeat invades from within"

" In the gloom of death that surrounded the two of us, we were just at the point of approaching and negotiating a gentle curve. If we bypassed it, we would be split off into different directions"

from Kitchen by Banana Yoshimoto.

I bought this bought on pure impulse, it is only 150 pages long, but every page made me think deeply about what is it the author wanted to convey: our ultimate mortality.

Although the style is in an irregular narrative sequence and the events are not chronologically or linearly drawn but that is its charm and the sentences are so concise, the words so precise and full of meaning between the lines. I loved the simplicity and I loved how it was able to jerk tears from my eyes not only because of the tragedy of romantic love but also the frailty of human condition, transgressing time, body and space.

Have you read her books ?

Type rest of the post here

2009-11-20T12:50:00.006+02:00

The age of superheroes and contemporary anxiety

I have not read comic books since I was a nerdy teenager tampering with writing computer programmes and believing I was some kind of genius- would- be- hacker.

But this year a republished 80s graphic novel story caught my eye. I missed it because at the time it was issued my favourite magazines and papers had started to trickle down in the bookshops in Tripoli.

So when I was filling up my basket with all sorts of books on one of my trips this year the beautiful colours on the cover " The Watchmen " caught my eye . So I could not resist... it then lay for months on a shelf in my room when it finally got picked up to be read on a flight where I knew there would be no movies.

The flight went like a dream and I spent the night completing the book at the hotel instead of doing my homework. Gripping plot!

Reading the book I felt nostalgia towards the Superman era when as a child, part of me wanted to believe he was real. But unlike Superman, the Watchmen at the end of the day were very much human and that is their appeal and that is also what makes us slightly uneasy...

We all love heroes and I think we Arabs more than others perhaps adore them, I think many of us are probably waiting hoping deep down inside for a superhero to redress the wrongs, free Palestine, unite the Arabs and generally create a miracle. This story shows that heroes whether human or not actually have limited powers just like the Greek Gods and if we believe that they are omnipotent then we are in for trouble.
However, I enjoyed the story on another level as well.. I had forgotten that back in the 80s the world was griped by a bloody superpower proxy war which started technically with the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan against the backdrop of the India - Pakistan conflict. I forgot how much Afghanistan and Vietnam were very much present for Americans and by proxy the rest of the world had to suffer too. I did not realise how much the ordinary American people feared communism to the extent of paranoia and hatred. How much they were afraid that a nuclear war on them would take place ( and they still do but a bit less now, forgetting they were the only nation who had ever used nukes on humans ) and how much this fear had warped the thinking. How much they were seeking WMD to give them a tactical advantage.

Reading the Watchmen I realised that this fear is very much true for people on the street and that the media, politicians' ego and ambitions and business corporations are the main culprits and the root of all evil.

This 'comic' transported me for a few hours back in history.

The handling of Afghanistan 20 years ago has put the wheels in motion for this century's worldstage anxieties. The scarriest bit is that no one has learnt the lesson and that it is still business as usual. When will we realise that a hero does not simply appear to save us while we wait at the bus stop of life. The hero is within each one of us ready to pounce and seize the day when we are ready to shed our fears!

2009-11-04T18:02:00.004+02:00

'Investing' in Northern Ireland

I wrote this post lamenting hypocrisy in the Western world with regards to the IRA case. As expected only non - Europeans and non-Americans supported my opinion.

I would have been pleasantly surprised if someone from those two categories had come forth and said yes I agree with you Highlander, the United States IS hypocritical in its stance towards this issue and the involvement of its own citizens and organisations in the terrorism that the IRA perpetrated decades ago; and the Irish need ALSO to bear responsibility for these atrocities, because they are both the PRIMARY sources of funding.

Only reader Craig said: " It's very odd. I can't find any mention of the compensation payments the Irish made for IRA terrorism? I even tried a variety of Google searches. Nada. Every hit comes back talking about Libya. I find it completely baffling that the British would demand compensation from a secondary source when they haven't gotten any compensation - nor appear to have even sought any - from the primary source."

That's not bad as comments go :) at least he acknowledged something ( but against the Brits), I'm not sure if I should give him the benefit of the doubt that by 'Irish' he meant Irish-Americans :P most probably not and though I'm glad he noted the above I still wish the British Government had the guts to ask American citizens for compensation for the victims of IRA terrorism funded by their money and have a delegation from Northern Ireland visit the US and Ireland to talk about this and show them how their material support has hurt people. I mean they can get the names of every individual who transferred money, like they do when I transfer more than 50$ outside Libya and it has to go through US banks before going to the florist in Britain with whom I ordered flowers for a friend's party!

Instead we have to suffer this ignominy and alone pay the price for the other two countries who were the major contributors to the conflict ! see below:

Just hot of the news: "A delegation of politicians has just returned from Libya [.]The team presented a proposal that Libya participate in a humanitarian programme for peace and reconciliation for the benefit of all affected in the United Kingdom, particularly in Northern Ireland.

The proposal includes substantial business and infrastructure investment and wide-ranging community development projects aimed at bringing closure for those who have suffered in the past, including resolution of existing claims by UK citizens involving Libya."

We will probably end up paying more than Italy's measly 5 billion $ (over 25 years) for actually decimating the Libyan population, ridiculous indeed .

Can you tell I'm 'upset' :P

2009-10-18T20:07:00.005+02:00

The IRA case: hypocrisy and compensations

Last month I wrote about the curse of blood money that seems to follow Libya.

I said that the Americans are resting in peace with regards to compensations on this particular case as they have received it already. It's only the British who feel cheated.....
The irony is that the US government/politicians etc... are always prompt to point injustice and help those who have no pulpit to raise their voice from, but what we don't always realise is that this happens only until they get what they want. Once that is secured they could not care less. US victims are always more precious :)

But to be honest why not? This does not surprise me it is basic looking out for yourself, why would any gov worry about other chattel ? other people's responsibility.

I don't mind as long as people don't portray themselves something they are not. I hate hypocrisy and I see a big red herring in terms of hypocrisy with the US stance towards victims.

Such as this bit:

" Asked whether she would support parity of treatment for victims of terrorist attacks, such as the Lockerbie bombing, Mrs Clinton diplomatically avoided answering the question directly.

Mrs Clinton said that she "grieved for all victims", saying that she has met many, but added: "I do not have an opinion about the question that you asked specifically."

Last year, during his visit to Belfast, former US President George W Bush was urged to back the victims' case against Libya but failed to do so." [source]

On another note, looks like that blood money to the Brits will soon be coughed up :P

" A delegation of MPs has been invited to Libya to discuss possible compensation for the families of IRA victims." [source].

Yep that is a firm step two!

PS I have the flu, could it be swine flu ? it is progressing real fast !

2009-09-17T19:04:00.004+02:00

Highlander is 6 years old

Ramadan and Libya being constantly on the news because of the Megrahi and other issues made me forget two important dates.

(1) The anniversary of the execution of Omar Mukhtar.
(2) This blog's birthday.

Yes Highlander has turned six since last month! There have been many learning points :)

The next important date is this Saturday as it will be the first day of Eid El Fitr in Libya

Eid Mabrouk folks !

Type rest of the post here

2009-09-07T18:35:00.008+02:00

Libya and the curse of blood money

When Megrahi, the alleged Lockerbie bomber was sent back to Libya to die last month, I wrote a tiny sentence in a very long post : " Oh please not another cycle.. it's getting lame who else now wants money ?"
Was this a premonition?......

Blogger Maya had commented" " About the US reactions to Mr. Megrahi's welcome in Libya - I do not quite understand you. There were similar reactions in Libya when the Bulgarian medics were welcomed and immediately pardoned, weren't there? It is only logical and does not necessarily indicate that somebody "wants more money".

My reply was that " I agree that 'it does not mean someone wants more money' but in the Libya case that's what seems to happen always :P but that was not my point this time."

Again it seems that time has proven me right ( if ever my old friend DM is still reading this blog he would nod his head in approval... I have always been right :P eh?).

No sooner had Megrahi made it back to Libya that the cries for compensation for IRA victims started to trickle in on August 25. I chose to look the other way, but now I am more than convinced I was correct in my assumption.

Just two days ago, "Gordon Brown has confirmed the UK will support compensation claims being made against Libya by IRA victims' families." [ref]

Apparently the Americans as usual had already negotiated compensation from Libya for their citizens ages ago cutting out the British in the process:

"Out-of-court deals have been agreed by Libya with three American victims of IRA atrocities.

But more than 100 UK IRA victims, who had been pursuing similar claims through the US courts, had been excluded from those deals" [ref].

Moreover, we are constantly reminded that the families of the US Lockerbie victims have received compensation, what did the UK victims receive?

Ironically numerous people in the UK lost family as a direct result of American aid, one minor example being the funding sent through the tarnished NORAID organisation. We cannot forget that there was (it may not be that politcally correct anymore) widespread support for the IRA from a large group of Americans of Irish descent and other rich American misanthropes :P... the process only started to be curbed when it bit the US in the face. But my impression is that Americans don't really like those Brits anyway so turning a blind eye could be more than OK,

Today I wonder why is the US not paying blood money also for the victims of IRA terrorism ? It's attitude towards what constitutes terrorism leaves a lot to be desired (but you all know that now this is a useless conjecture).

In conclusion it's easier to just demand money from Libya, because the US can always give the excuse " oh but we have no power over what individual citizens chose to do"! LOL no they only have power when that individual is Muslim or Arab. Irish - Americans have not been incarcerated or viewed with mistrust for their relation to Ireland in their community and by their government - why ? again because they are white and so the xenophobia will not play against them. Xenophobia is selective and the UK is playing a game of distracting the world to gain points with the US and try to shift the blame of the current political fiasco between them on Libya.. The UK would not dare ask America for compensation.

The things goverments, politicians and those in power will do for strategic, national and personal interests... oh and I don't blame them - I merely remark on things

2009-09-01T01:39:00.003+02:00

Donkeys vs People: The Media Circus

Even before Megrahi left Scotland I expected the media circus, the inflammatory notes and last minute bandwagon jumpers. So predictable!

I am not discussing here the Scottish decision or the UK – US relations or even those silly enough to want to boycott Scotland :) that was hilarious to read, because I can remember when the US was mad at France: renaming fried potatoes as freedom fries smacked of third world behaviour to me. Seriously is that all the US can do to punish a European country that does not want to follow its lead all the time? I bet you that if some similar act that displeased the US government had been perpetrated by a non Western country and especially if that country was Arab or Muslim or both (the term is interchangeable for them) the ink would not have been allowed to dry before that country would have born the brunt of the wrath of a vengeful nation. That fictitious country would have been shocked and awed and given a lesson in justice.

Please USA, show me you are even handed in your 'justice' and go punish your British allies now. Can you please start by closing their bank accounts and preventing access to any investments they have in the US and the world, can you slap sanctions and bully the UNSC to do so as well, can you further show me you are just and blitz bomb Edinburgh and London ? Of course none of this is going to happen because these are your old colonial masters and even though the UK is somehow a multiethnic society now with a large number of immigrants it is still WHITE.

Ok got that off my chest now let me go back to my topic.

Sadly, the majority of Libyans are not that interested in Megrahi's fate. In trying to catch up with the lost years (partly due to sanctions and partly our fault) many of us have become so superficial that we'd rather strive for a bigger income, buy more bling, cars, land, farms and show off. The least on the mind of a large number of my compatriots are things like "has there been justice?" Many of us as so weary of this story (over 20 years now) and believe that it is old and that guilty or not we have paid to the West what they wanted so can this please go away now.

While it is understandable that family members of the victims of the Pan AM flight are saddened and even angered at this outcome, I find it hypocritical that the US media and the US politicians view this from such a narrow angle. I am not laying blame on them alone but on most of the West and the western wannabes. The double standards used are so conspicuous that for me it evokes the word RACISM.

It was actually Bulgarian reader and blogger Maya who reminded me of an interesting comparison:

"About the US reactions to Mr. Megrahi's welcome in Libya - I do not quite understand you. There were similar reactions in Libya when the Bulgarian medics were welcomed and immediately pardoned, weren't there? It is only logical and does not necessarily indicate that somebody "wants more money"." [ref]

Therefore, the US reaction is logical because they believe they have been cheated of the right for vengeance and so cannot see that someone is happy to have a family member back in their midst. The Bulgarian reaction is logical also because they have their compatriots (the medics) back, but then so is the Libyan reaction logical! Why not? Why would it be OK for Bulgarians to show happiness and for Libyans to hide it? Where was the outcry from international community and at its head the US? If I recall well every western country was falling over its head to claim they were the ones who instigated the release of the Bulgarian medics.

In the words of Ghadafi: "Perhaps they have feelings, and we don't? Maybe we are donkeys, and they are people?". Sometimes one wonders.

The Lockerbie issue and the Libyan Children with AIDS issue are actually quite similar.

Lockerbie:

(1) Alleged Libyan bomber convicted and sentenced - after bringing a country to its knees with sanctions- by a European court under immense US pressure and meddling. There are so many question marks on the procedures and evidence. It just is not so well glued together, to the point were some people have cried that there was miscarriage of justice. If you feel like reading more these two bloggers (1 , 2) have accumulated a number of articles which while not proof show that Libya's guilt is at the very least debatable.

(2) Megrahi serves 8 years in prison in Scotland (I think he would have been killed a long time ago if he served them in the US).

(3) US families receive 10 million $ compensation each – not sure what the Scottish families did. ( I'm OK with the concept of compensation after all it is blood money, you can take it and usually forgive ( ie drop the charges) or relinquish your right to take it and either drop the charges or not)

(4) Global circumstance change and the political machine is set in motion.

(5) Megrahi released to die home on compassionate grounds.

(6) Megrahi received home and given what looks like a hero's welcome. There is no life to resume. We still don't know who did it (except the US: P), so justice is not served for the families of the victims. Some families believe that he is a scapegoat

(7) Outrage by the West

(8) Megrahi gets a kiss and hug from the head of state the following day- more outrage- but is that such a big deal? just reflect about it I don't need to spell it out...

(9) British diplomats think the release of Libyan national was worth it.

Libyan children injected with AIDS issue

(1) Bulgarian medics (+ their Palestinian friend) convicted by a Libyan court for allegedly injecting Libyan children in hospital in Benghazi with the AIDS virus. International experts brought from the West who maintain that scientifically this is not correct etc.. so still many question marks on the procedures and evidence.

(2) They served 8 years also in Libyan prison.

(3) Global circumstances change and the political machine is set in motion and the death sentence is lifted from over their head.

(4) The death sentence is commuted to prison only and the medics are released to Bulgaria on the condition they serve the remaining sentence there.

(5) Medics given a widely broadcasted real hero's welcome in Bulgaria and all over the world with Mrs Sarkozy accompanying them. Immediately pardoned by the president so they go to resume their life free, even though justice is not really served for the Libyan children and we don't know what was the real story, and a number of Libyans still believe they are guilty

(6) The west celebrates and one more point 'gained' for freedom from those 'evil' Arabs.

(7) Outrage by Libyans only – nobody else cares

(8) Compensation or blood money finally set in motion for 1 million $ per family. Bargain price he he he. 10:1 and European diplomats think that the release of the European medics and their tag-along Palestinian friend was worth it.

The funny part is that unlike the media's portrayal which carried two photos only across the world and made a mountain out of a molehill, Megrahi did not receive a hero's welcome. The streets were the usual when he returned because the ordinary Libyan as I said had more pressing things to think about like shopping for Ramadan and eking out a living. But there is nothing preventing his tribe, family and friends from welcoming him at the airport and feasting him at home. After all for them he is innocent and anyway just because your dad is a convict you don't stop loving him. One article states that thousands of jubilant crowds greeted him, then a few paragraphs later states that it was a low key approach: " al-Megrahi's welcome was relatively muted. Hundreds of people waiting in the crowd for his plane were rushed away by authorities at the last minute, and the arrival was not aired live on state TV."

Hell I could raise at least 25,000 relatives to greet me when I return from treatment overseas or even if I had gone to prison. For them I'm still Highlander.

So to go back to the beginning Maya reminded me that reactions are logical depending on where you are situated. The only problem is that we need to be fair and either condemn both the Bulgarians (and the West) and Libyans for their jubilation. Or shut our mouth.

I could not care less about the relationship between the two Western allies, it's their problem and they will sort it out soon, it's just that some egos have been bruised and some people did not get a piece of the political pie and so are bitter about it. What I'm worried about is that both countries will bury their differences and unite to somehow inflict pain on Libya, the mechanism has already started…everyone who has a grievance wants payment :P but that's not today's post.

My biggest disappointment is that now that the documents have been sealed forever we will never know what really happened on the ill fated Pan Am flight and more than a lingering doubt will remain about this unresolved mystery.

2009-08-20T22:07:00.012+03:00

The sum of all conspiracies

Ramadan 2005, in an era when Highlander was more prolific:

" paying compensation to the victims is insignificant to get out of international isolation, if that is the price even if he is innocent because stagnancy on the issue dragged on too long. As the old adage says "when you can't beat them .join them !". If further evidence prove he is innocent, then he should be compensated, Libyans should be compensated, the compensation money we paid should be returned and the world will owes us a collective apology. If he is not innocent ..well he is in prison anyway and compensations to victims have been settled. All is legal. [sic]"

Now the so called Lockerbie bomber is back home. If I had any doubts before, they are evaporating fast.. the guy is most probably innocent...or is he not?

I mean he was in the process of appealing and they let him go on condition he drops the appeal, the 'compassionate grounds' thingy while commendable seems like an excellent smokescreen, same as Mrs Clinton's attempts to block his release a few days ago It's just designed to throw dust in our eyes, and hasten the process of dropping the appeal because he is dying and wants to go home.

These points keep running in circles in my head:

(1) Libya and Megrahi are innocent of this atrocity.
(2) The appeal would have turned up embarrassing evidence proving Libya's innocence.

"Secret documents before the Appeal Court - which even the defence has not seen - might have provided new information.
They will now remain undisclosed, after the foreign secretary issued a Public Information Immunity certificate stating that to publish them would be to the detriment of UK national security." [ref].

{3) Libya has already paid out the compensations..
(4) Megrahi's illness was a gift allowing bargaining to come into place for his transfer or release whichever is more suitable, and allows to save taxpayers' money.
(5) Hillary's attempted blocking was the icing over the cake - adds spice to the cooking so that we really believe that all is fair and just and governments are outraged :P
{6) Truth has a way of turning up but now we have lost the legal grounds for compensation for the years of sanctions and suffering since 1992.

But it's not that simple, it is intertwined in a number of issues which have put the Libyans in this unenviable situation... I am not interested in elaborating further as I'm aware of our own mistakes and applaud those smart enough to make use of every 'loophole'.
What I hate the most are these kind of statements:

"Crowley told reporters that the administration will closely watch how al-Megrahi is received in Libya and that his reception may affect U.S.-Libyan relations." [ref].

Oh please not another cycle.. it's getting lame who else now wants money ?

On an another note since last month we are no longer swine flu free and for those of you who asked about my opinion on Mr Obama's June Cairo speech (though I never had any hopes as you know ) I was still prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt - but he lost me forever when he stated:

"America

's strong bonds with Israel are well known. This bond is unbreakable. It is based upon cultural and historical ties, and the recognition that the aspiration for a Jewish homeland is rooted in a tragic history that cannot be denied."

The day the US is able to free itself from its self imposed bondage with Israel is still a long way.

If you read so far you know that I'm back folks..oh and Ramadan Mabrouk :)

2009-06-23T19:04:00.003+03:00

June movie review

It's been a long time since I updated my movie list. In no particular order maximum 5 stars

XIII the conspiracy - awarded 2 stars only I simply could not get the feel of the action

X-Men origins wolverine - can I say 6 stars ? I simply loved the plot and everything about it - to me this is the best X- men so far.

Yes Man - 4 stars it was a fun movie

The curious case of Benjamin Button - a well deserved 5 star
Seven Pounds - 5 stars - great theme

Beowulf ( with Angeline Jolie) - a dismal 2 stars although the cartoons deserve a 4 star

Frost Nixon - 4 and a half star - I just did not like the actor who played Frost :)

Knowing ( Nicholas Case) - 2 stars only - actually regret buying this DVD

More next months

2009-05-29T02:18:00.007+03:00

Musings about the Swine Flu

Swine flu is no longer breaking news material and seems to have become 'another flu' just like bird flu. We know it's there but we don't think about it much, even though we are anticipating the second deadly wave around autumn.

I remember at the beginning when it looked like it was going to be something bigger than bird flu or even SARS how I used to read testimonies from all over the world to evaluate the situation of the outbreak. A family's ordeal in the UK struck me as something like a movie script...

"My partner and I returned to Birmingham from Cancun yesterday morning at 08:20am. There were no members of the health department there to meet us, over 400 people passed through without help or advise being offered.
We returned home to our seven-months-old daughter and in-laws. Last night we developed many of the symptoms listed.
I contacted the NHS Direct and after several hours we were asked to go to the hospital ourselves. We had to wait in A&E before being seen by doctors dressed in masks, aprons and gloves.
We have high temperatures over 38 degrees, aches, coughing and sneezing, diarrhoea and nausea. The hospital prescribed us both with Tamiflu and told us to drive to a chemist in Coventry, we waited for 15 minutes surrounded by other people before we had the Tamiflu.
The chemist informed us that they only had one dose available and that we would need to return the following day. This morning we were contacted by the HPA, we informed them of the situation and they told us that under no circumstances should we leave the house.
We are waiting the results now, we are very concerned about our daughter and family around us as it looks like we have now infected them. "
Richard Cook, Nuneaton, UK

The pandemic scenario painted by the WHO means that what happened to the family above could have resulted in a much worse situation and that maybe a few basic rules had been flaunted.

(1) no members of health department at the airport
(2) no one offering advice
(3) they contacted the NHS who asked them to go to the hospital => so putting many people at risk on the way !
(4) they had to wait at the ER => more contact with people
(5) they had high temperature and were sneazing
(6) they had to go on their own to get the medicine from the pharmacy => putting more people at risk on their way
(7) they were asked to return the second day to get more Tamiflu.

Only 3 days after they returned were they contacted by the equivalent of the CDC and asked to stay put. I don't know what happened to them but I expected this to happen in an non EU OECD country, like Libya for example. How safe are we really and is it realistic to expect that people will watch their borders as closely as we imagine or does that only happen in movies?

I had the opportunity to experience first hand and compare when I recently travelled to Britain.

Upon boarding the flight to London from Tripoli international airport, there were a number of medical staff at the gate, the tube to the airplane has obviously been cleaned and sprayed with something similar to Dettol- so I assumed this was a request by the country of destination so that travellers do not bring any germs in the sole of shoes or something.

My flight landed about the same time as a flight arriving from Mexico, and my luggage was on the conveyor belt right next to the one of the Mexico flight. I saw no body with face mask or from any medical body and that area was quite crowded. It was just business as usual. I retrieved my baggage very fast and proceeded to the customs and the way out.

When I returned to Libya, we were greeted at the gate by medical staff with masks and gloves who proceeded to screen travellers by checking their forehead temperatures. I realise it may not be much and I'm not that knowledgeable medically but I guess that someone with fever was going to be asked to step outside into another area. I think Hong Kong had already been using sophisticated thermal scanners since the bird flu alert, we have nothing like that in Libya but I was happy at the effort deployed no matter how insignificant or ridiculous or annoying some people were thinking it was.

So far Libya and the rest of the Maghreb as Swine flu free. For the naysayers and negative people who see always only the bad sides yes we do have lots of other problems but it's good to know someone has thought about this virus because if it is as dangerous as they say then our health system cannot deal with it, so an ounce of prevention goes a long way.

Our neighbours in Egypt had decided to cull pigs - I'm not sure that's such a great idea because the waste generated is above their capacity to clean up and could probably cause an outbreak of something else besides Swine flu. I mean they still have cases of bird flu as recently as last week.

The Swine flu or Mexican flu as some people call it (unfairly) has also brought a number of questions to my mind it has now spread into over 42 countries. ( see map here for confirmed cases and deaths). So why many of us would hesitate to go to Mexico even though we know now it is a mild strain - and yet would travel to the USA or to Europe without any second thoughts?

Another idea to ponder on is that human greed is the cause of all disasters and similarly to Mad Cow Disease, Swine flu also seems to have a human mismanagement component in farming. When we mess with nature it always backfires.

2009-05-01T22:30:00.008+03:00

Libyan Female Writers

Beirut has been chosen as the World Book Capital this year, and the bookworm that I wanted so much to be there and immerse myself in all these books on display but I had other commitments.

There has indeed been a flurry of Arab novels in the last few years not only in the Arab world but also on the international scene. Recalling the hit books by Arab authors that reached international fame, I found myself nodding in agreement with the statement that ""The West likes Arab novels that deal with political oppression, women, or sexual taboos. ""...

Algerian writer Ahlam Mosthaghanemi is not far from this thought
when she notes that:

"Arabic writers are accepted in the West only if they criticise their homeland or their culture and religion. The West only promotes Arab writers who criticise their own people and culture. Mosthaghanemi, who has more than 2 million readers in the Arab world, said her works are not well received by the Western world because of her great respect for the Arab culture and her religion."

Something tells me that's how our very own Hisham became famous ;) but that is not today's topic so put those filed tongues back where they belong he he he....

What I had been thinking about all along was... are taboos really stiffling Arab women writers as this article implies ? which is again what Mosthaghanemi whom I respect immensely states :

" [..]as women writers are forbidden from using personal emotions as a tool of creative writings, most of the works of Arab women lack the warmth of real life. “We have to take great risks to portray the basic emotions of human beings like love, lust and romance”".

It vividly brought to mind a chat I had with a great Arab blogger friend of mine (let's call her A) about why with all her talent, head firmly on her shoulders and great humour does she not write a book. A told me that she shelved her dreams of writing novels because everything she wants to write about could be unacceptable.

This led me to have a short look at Libyan blogs after all even blogging is writing n'est ce pas?

And so I discovered that poet Lolitta's blog was no longer available... a week after she made this post :

Lolitta is Libyan and she writes beautiful daring poetry in English. Is it social pressure or is it because she has gotten married and simply moved on?

In a ranting from back in January, it was with surprise that I noted Shahrazad complaining that :

" Many Libyan female bloggers have either left the blogspehere all together or have made their blogs open to invites only [because]hey have been put into the so called pressured social paralysis situation where either the parents or some other family member has read the so called blog and disapproved of it existing . On the other hand these fanatic members of family read other blogs and enjoy them as well[.]Many fathers have given consent to their daughters writing a blog and quite a few are so proud of them and encourage them continuously until they get entangled in the dos and don’t of a young lady still unmarried whose future hubby might not approve of her blog!"

I'm all for sharing everything with family but it's difficult enough to be a blogger so why bother to tell anyone? (personally I regret telling some people - who are not family about it but I was happily surprised that one of my brothers who stumbled on it by chance loved it and was so proud of me he actually wanted me to stop being anonymous). Use the blogosphere as a sandpit to hon in your writing skills ladies - and don't tell anyone yet :P

I don't think that the Libyan males are against their sisters, mothers, wives etc. writing but more as social pressure and the 3ayb part - as in what cannot be seen then does not exist... or that the precious females maybe recognised and their ideas misintepreted and God forbid their reputation ruined because Libyan dudes would be trolling their website/blog . This was indeed confirmed in the comments from various Libyan female bloggers on that post here.

I think that's why controversial Libyan Violet's blog is hardly known and people who do comment do so almost shyly because most of her writing is about love or sometimes blatant erotica and all one anonymous commenter could tell her was " u're longing for an orgasm ".

Then I checked Luna and she echos Shahrazad " we Libyan bloggers especially the women face tremendous pressures from family ,work and all who are close. Is Blogging such an awful thing ??I never in my mind thought it to be till I got into trouble with needless to say the closest people to me." Again some of the comments confirm the suspected weird behaviour that prompted some bloggers to go underground or in this case in 'restrict' mode.

This is a pity as we readers loose so much by not being able to tap into their ideas, experiences, emotions plus someone could actually be the next Nobel or Pulitzer prize winner.

We have tons of talented ladies!

So I guess if you keep to cooking recipes, mothering and crochet tips ( which I think is absolutely fine as topics as well) you are OK. If you venture into more mature ground whether you are blogging or being in the printed media - about your life, fantasies or hopes then you have two choices : (1) if you bash your own strongly enough then you will be celebrated in the West a la Hirsi Ali or (2) move to Beirut :) otherwise the climb is very steep!

2009-04-26T21:22:00.004+03:00

Facebook in Libya

Many of the earlier Libyan bloggers are hardly writing anymore, rumour has it they have moved to Facebook. I am not sure how you can blog on FB but I understand they just want to talk among each other as their real selves.

Over the years I've had dozens of requests to join FB. It seemed like all my friends were suddenly incapable of writing emails. Email became the new snail mail.. and I was left with a dwindling inbox. I still fought back the urge to join the community, until a great friend asked me to do so and I accepted to try it for fun. After creating the account and adding him I browsed and found that as I initially thought the Libyans were populating FB fast. So many bloggers were there, so many people. Young men and women and not so young either. I found one of my brothers had an account too and I toyed with adding him as friend but decided against it as his account was gathering dust....

Also, I did not like any of the add-ons, pokes and applications so avoided them like the plague. So there you have it the number of friends in my account are counted on the fingers of one hand and I have forgotten the password!

What brought FB back to my mind to warrant this post ? it's just that I've seen a few Libyan bloggers/readers mention it...

Dream Libya thinks the facebook era is quite evil " Facebook is a way to spy on your friends, what they do, who their Friends are, the more you put on your facebook account the less privacy you will have." and from him I found out that there is a large community of Libyans online there.

While Libyan Violet has discovered that it has now replaced the traditional informal way of investigating about the bride or the groom before the engagement "Don't tell your parents about her yet man, why dont you probe about her on facebook, check her profile, pictures, list of friends and who sent her flowers. Then investigate in Hi5 and it won't be wrong to Google her name see what comes up ... I mean I don't have anything specific on her, but you never know!".

Personally I think that this tool is OK to have; as a master data of friends and acquaintances all in one place where you can check on them from time to time. Also for finding long lost classmates and friends and satisfy your curiosity about what happened to your high school crush :P. For the security conscious I think there is nothing to fear, FB will dish out whatever you feed it and you can put as much info as you wish and you can ask your friends not to upload photos of you as well and usually if they are your friends then they have no business doing so and if they are not your friends then they would put your photos online regardless of being on FB or not! If you are paranoid then you should not be online in the first place!

But the main point is that I'm glad the bloggers are still around but simply in another place and I'm glad Libyans are networking too! I may join them at another time ...

2009-03-16T18:32:00.011+02:00

The Mysterious Libyan Coins

In my last post related to the economy in Libya, Khadijateri said "Are Libyans too lazy to carry coins? Are they [the coins] too heavy to lug around? Or is the problem that they are so difficult to count?".

I don't think any of these choices is the right answer :)

But it is not the first time that this issue has been brought to my attention....

Last year Khadijateri had already noted : "Another thing I can't understand is why people here [in Libya] hate using coins. When they raise the prices on goods in the shops they usually add a quarter of a dinar because that is the smallest banknote used here. When I first came to Libya, in 1989, using coins was common. It certainly would be better if they went back to using them again and then only raising the prices a few cents at a time instead of in big chunks."

I can't really state that Libyans hate using coins or are too lazy to do so, because we do use them overseas and we know how to and we also use them when available. The fact that at least in 1989 i.e . 20 years ago and some years after for sure, they were available is proof enough that we do love our coins. Are we too lazy or are the coins too heavy? Surely that can't be the case for all Libyans?

Our salaries are not always a perfect round number but would be something like this : 300 Dinars and 0.631 Dirhams, if I get this in cash then I would either receive 0.500 Dirham or 0.750 Dirham depending on the mood of our cashier. But most of us receive our money in our bank accounts and so those precious Dirhams accumulate and I like it this way. We also would love the prices not to rise in such increments as mentioned above because the smallest paper denomination is 0.250 (or 25 ) Dirhams. Why buy 5 breads instead of one only ?

"Until 1975, old coins denominated in milliemes (equal to the dirham) circulated. In 1975, coins were introduced in denominations of 1, 5, 10, 20, 50 and 100 dirham which bore the coat of arms of the Federation of Arab Republics. These were followed in 1979 by a second series of coins, in the same denominations, which bore a design of a horseman in place of the arms. ¼ and ½ dinar coins were issued in 2004. [1] 1, 5, 10, and 20 dirham coins are rarely used, if ever, as units of exchange. However, they still retain their status as legal tenders. [source]

See the old and new sets of coins here - but you need to scroll down to Libya:

The next logical question is why has the circulation of coins dwindled in Libya?

Theories:

(1) In the late 80's I remember reading in the local newspapers about the caravans of cisterns filled with coins that were busted on their way to cross the border to Egypt. Someone had been smuggling our coins outside the country. You can imagine how many coins can one cistern carry? But what would Libyan coins buy you in Egypt I used to think ? nothing really their value lay in the quality of the alloy they were made from.

(2) Greedy Libyan merchants were hoarding coins in order for the price increase to be large. Instead of 5 or 10 Dirham they would 'have' to raise it to 25 at least.

(3) The country was not minting enough coins.

Whatever it was the circulation of coins continued to decrease slowly but surely. At one point coins became so rare that I started collecting them each time I actually came accross some. I have a small jar full now. We learn to live with that especially during the sanction years, afterwards people were too busy consuming and becoming materialistic in their outlook. But now when prices have become astronomical due to inflation and our extreme hurry to catch up with capitalism many are wondering where are those elusive coins?
In my quest for the Libyan coins I saved an article from the Oea newspaper of November 8th 2008, issue no. 068 : " who is responsible for the non-circulation of coins? where have the coins that the Central Bank of Libya issued disappeared? Is it true that they are smuggled out of the country to be recycled? Is there a mafia that melts the coins to make sewage covers?".

The author confirms that at least one old man he knew had started throwing the coins in the rubbish as too heavy too carry around especially since they are useless with the spike in prices. Also the merchants have been hoarding those coins for decades as this is to their benefit, and yes a 'mafia' was busted smuggling coins because the alloy could be smolten into other useful things or sold as scrap metal and they would still make loads of money.

Once again this is a vicious circle, sometimes you don't notice things and when one does its quite late in the day.

For sure though that the following is true :

(1) The Central Bank of Libya (CBL) has been taking steps for some time now to combat this shortage by putting new coins into circulation at regular intervals. We've seen from the Wiki article above referenced that at least till 2004 some new coins have been punched out. Moreover, the CBL's website has a link to money issued and money taken out of circulation, and one of the sublinks refers specifically to coins. See the photo below, courtesy of CBL. We can see that there are 8 denominations ranging from 50 Dirhams to 1 Dirham and all are valid!

(2) The merchants have been exponentially increasing prices following anticipated pay rises and that means for sure that they have been hoarding coins for a long time.

The lack of coins actually hurts our economy because it affects:
(a) salaries
(b) purchasing power
(c) accounting
(d) it wastes public money

So it's definitely a combination of circumstances but I can't believe that as stated at the beginning of my post that we are so irresponsible as to throw money or are simply lazy.

For the last 3 months or so it has become very very common to get change in coins at least in 25 and 50 denominations which I'm always happy to accept and use, I've been surprised with a few 5 Dirhams as well in some government offices. Basically there is an effort and the supermarkets cashiers are full of shiny gold coloured coins. Hopefully this a good sign !

2009-03-06T11:48:00.007+02:00

The significance of foreign currency reserves, imported goods and inflation

"Libya had $44 billion balance of payments surplus in 2008[and]Libya's foreign currency reserves were at $136 billion at the end of 2008 [...]Oil producer Libya is among the few countries which are free of any foreign debt".[Reuters]

This all sounds like great news to me (regardless of the political system which is not my concern in this post.).

It's good to have liquidity in these high risk financial times. I still maintain that the OPEC countries though should stop pegging their economies to the US$ and diversify a little to spread the risk. Although I'm not sure at the safety of their respective countries from physical demolition if they do take that step. But the global financial crisis and credit crunch gripping most nations could be used as an excuse to divest from the US$ and stockpile gold bullion as in not put all the eggs in one basket). Maybe then the US will run less high trade deficits and get away with it! but this is not my concern today either :P

What I was wondering about was the central bank governor in the same article I quoted above was saying i.e. that "average inflation is expected to fall sharply this year as a result of the decline of prices of food and other imported goods as well as the fall of the euro-Libyan dinar parity,".

Again I'm no economist so I'm not able to project into the future but would appreciate someone explaining this to me.

Does he mean that in quarter 2 or quarter 3 of the financial year prices will drop ? Because I thought that many commodities have definetely increased - check On the Edge "I couldn't BELIEVE how much food items have gone up ! A small jar of coffee that used to be 3.50 is now 6 dinars and the large would be 10 , when it was only 7 something last month". This is imported goods that she is talking about.But maybe supermarkets in Libya are making their own prices unrelated to the global situation. I think the eggs are cheaper but for sure car fuel has gone up it is now officially at 20 dirham per litre. To be honest I was embarassed at the gas station when I asked him to fill up my car for 5 Dinars and that barely reached half of the car tank. I thought the employee was cheating and regretfully it showed in my faces (even though I did not voice it) and he had to explain that prices had gone up.

So basically if inflation goes down, will fuel, bread and food commodities decrease too ? How does this work ?

2009-03-02T15:50:00.004+02:00

The Gaza Aid Convoy in Libya

"Thousands of people have contacted me to say that they have marched, cried at the television pictures and feel helpless in the face of the suffering.

That’s why I have launched a major initiative in response to the humanitarian crisis in Gaza. I will be leading an aid convoy from London to Gaza leaving on 14 February and travelling through France, Spain, Morocco, Algeria, Tunisia, Libya, Egypt and through Rafah and into Gaza. It will bring material aid and raise the banner of Palestine in all the countries that we visit.

The convoy will be led by a British fire engine, ambulances, and many trucks full of practical aid given by the various communities in Britain.

It is quite an undertaking, which I anticipate will have a high public profile throughout its journey and on its arrival in Gaza, god willing, some 30 days later." George Galloway

I was aware from media activity that the Gaza Convoy initiated by George Galloway was going to pass through Libya, but since I was not following the news closely I was not aware it had arrived.

So when I was driving in Tripoli yesterday afternoon I noticed a humongous traffic jam on the coastal road. I assumed there must have been some visiting VIP or a road accident. But as I got closer I noticed too many trucks too count and all had a Viva Palestina banner. Only then did I remember about this planned convoy.

I mean many of us had already donated to the various charities and movements collecting money for Gaza even to the Viva Palestina cause . But it was one thing to read about it and another to see the sheer number of trucks and people surrounding them live. Can you imagine more than 5 lanes of cars stopped in the street - litterally parked alongside the trucks !

I was talking at that time to my best friend and mentioned the trucks to him, he suggested I take a photo with the cellphone and I really did want to join the group and shake some hands and take a few photos but I was driving on the other side of the road separated by concrete - it would be suicidal to stop and run accross the road.

It was definetely a great sight anda lump rose in my throat...not just for Palestine but also the incredible emotions of my Libyan brethrens. I knew that the visitors would have a grand time in Libya - because being hospitable is what we do best and I'm not counting the trucks filled with goods that Libya has donated to this cause this time again.

Reading the testimonies online was an added bonus:

"This is the best welcome we received. What is different this time is that the authorities did not try to stop the people mingling and getting close to us, nothing was orchestrated, it was natural and spontaneous.." [Viva Palestina website].

I'm happy to hear that they will be allowed into Gaza from Egypt! Well done to all.

2009-02-20T14:52:00.005+02:00

Movie reviews

The bootleg industry is great to watch those movies that you would miss in cinemas. In Libya a DVD is about 3 Dinars for a superb copy just as good as what you would get at any Virgin store. While for 1 Dinar I can get the CD and still be able to enjoy the show.

Between September 2007 and January 2009 I bought many movies here the list of the ones I watched so far and what think about them. This would probably serve me as an aide memoire not to buy the same movie again ( I tend to do that with books as well)....

The films are not in any particular order: the scale is from 1-5 stars, ( 5 being the highest)

Ironman: 5 stars
Mirrors ( Kiefer Sutherland): 3 stars
The love guru: 4 stars
Baby Mama : 5 stars
Anthony Warrior of God ( foreign movie): 2 stars
Body of lies: 5 stars
Arn (foreign movie) : 3 stars
Flags of our fathers: 4 stars
What happens in Vegas: 4 stars
Mamma Mia: 5 stars
The secret life of bees: 5 stars
Live free or die hard: 5 stars Bruce always delivers.
The dark knight: 5 stars- although I did not think that the Joker was overshadowing Batman as some reviews stated.
PS I love you : 5 stars very good to watch with chocies and a cup of tea
Tropic Thunder: 3 stars I failed to see the humour - but the twist is OK
Death Race: 2 stars - the trailer was the nicest thing about it
The notebook: 5 stars another classic romance
In the valley of Elah: 5 stars- It's good to know about the hidden things
Burn after reading: 1 star - I cant' believe Brad and Clooney would star in such a miserable thing.
Nights in Rodanthe: 5 stars - marvellous but I wish it ended differently
Wanted ( Angelina Jolie): 3 stars - more hype then when you see the real stuff
Zodiac: 4 stars not bad
The Day the Earth stood still ( Keanu Reeves): 5 stars - good topic on environment etc..
Frost/Nixon: 5 stars
Xiii the conspiracy : 2 stars - some idea but not sure what it was all about
Casino Royale: 5 stars, I did not like the first half hour but then I understood the story.
Quantum of Solace: 5 stars - Daniel Craig is so gorgeous once more. I will be watching Bond movies again
Masjoon Transit ( Egyptian) : 5 stars - that was a good idea
Wa7ed min al nass ( Egyptian) : 5 stars - another good issue tackled
Hassan wa Marcus (Egyptian): 5 stars- excellen portrayal
Kasf hesab ( Egyptian): 5 stars - quite enjoyed it
Cabaret ( Egyptian): 5 stars - the story lasts all night long up to the next day and shows the different facets of the people in a cabaret, the owner the prostitute, the singer the guests, the Gulfies and even the wannabe terrorist. Good finale
The House bunny: 5 stars a feel good movie
Twilight: 5 stars - I never stopped loving vampires and this one gorgeous
Original sin ( Banderas- Jolie) : 4 stars and quite racy definetely over 18- good concept
Miss conception : 5 stars a cute story about a girl who discovers she has early menaupose.
American Psycho: 3 stars - too gory- I still can't understand why?
Ocean's 13: 4 stars
Breach: 5 stars
Babel: I gave it 2 stars first then I watched it again and gave it 5.
Jarhead: 5 stars
Deja vu: 3 stars even though Denzel is so hot
The Marine: 1 star - the only good thing about this movie is the title
The forgotten: 5 stars
the sentinel 5 stars
the departed: 5 stars
300: 5 stars
Tristan and Isolde: 5 stars
The number 23: 5 stars but I was so scared
Caramel ( Lebanese): 5 stars stuff that happens in a beauty center in Beirut and the lives that cross each other there. I liked the
Mr Brooks: 5 stars
Home of the Brave: 5 stars
The Good Sheperd: 5 stars and my super favourite
WallE: 5 stars - I was reluctant to watch this kiddie movie but now I'm a fan.
No country for old men : 1 star - I hated it
21: 5 stars
Gone baby gone: 3 stars
1000 BC: 5 stars overall.

I still have a huge list to be watched but at least I'm finally catching up.

Which movies did you like and why ?

2009-01-31T00:34:00.008+02:00

Nine souls: Lessons of a dying cat

Just as the muezzin had finished calling for the dawn prayer her eyes finally glazed over after a night of agony. I started to unfold the large blue kitchen tablecloth and holding her up slowly from her feet and arms, I gently placed her on the cloth then proceeded to wrap her in it (she will be buried later that day).

A this point I allowed myself to cry out all the feelings I've holed up for the last weeks, because no matter how much you prepare yourself for imminent loss.
Being in the presence of a soul that is dying is not only solemn you actually feel the cold creeping in and become close to a near death experience. You are brought face to face with all the questions that you usually repress at the back of your mind.

Why we are on this earth and what happens after we die? Is dying painful or is it a release as we would like to think?

The incredible sadness of the loss is tearing your heart out. In her case it was tearing my heart several times until dawn. Each time I would think she has exhaled the last sigh and last breath. She wakes up again looks at me with forlorn expression, screams in pain, kicks her legs, opens her jaws to the point of breaking, yawns and makes a unearthly sound from the deepest part of her throat and stops breathing. The last heave was the strongest.. I did not know it was possible for a soul to take so long to die… nine hours –. No amount of calling the veterinary or Adib was this time going to change anything.

Whoever said that cats had nine lives is right! I spent nine hours helplessly watching her die, nine times over.

It's been a while now since she has left us hopefully to a better place, yet I still hear her bell on the stairs at night, and I still think she is sitting near the heater. I still call her in the morning then remember that I don't need to fill the bowl of food anymore, and the bed is very very cold without her cuddling on my feet.

Pet loss and all the emotions entailed are acknowledged in the literature and with a variety of coping mechanisms.

I find myself agreeing with this statement: "For someone who has truly loved a pet, however, the loss of that animal can feel just as devastating as a human loss, if not more. The very things that make animals different than humans often make them more endearing. An animal who doesn’t talk can’t pass judgment or give you the silent treatment or withhold companionship and love. For many, pets provide a source of unwavering love, affection and companionship. The qualities of a beloved pet are hard to match in human form. The loss of that companion can be heartbreaking."

This again led me to think that if I felt that much pain for my longtime pet, how much are parents feeling for the loss of their child. I think what made her death even more intolerable and led me into a downward spiral is that it came at the time when the recent 22 day war on Gaza was taking place so I could only focus on daily death toll from that attack and every photo of the injured or dead especially children became unbearable.

Some families lost more than one child. I shudder and can only imagine by proxy the pain of feeling helpless for your own child. You have given birth and raised him/her only to have that erased in a jiffy.

I also discovered that both camps cared about their pets as well in the middle of the carnage.

For example these Israelis devastated at the possible loss of their dog and the Palestinians who despite sustaining a heavy death (if I believe the news it is 13:1300) were able to attempt to save some pets. ( see photos right and left)

Pets are therefore family members.

The most obvious lesson that I learned from my dying cat is that DEATH is inevitable and we are ALONE when we die; it is also extremely painful for the dying and for those left behind - regardless of the process being swift or protracted.

It was also one more death in the family that needed to be promptly dealt with 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009 it looks like everyone is dying all of a sudden and there is no time to stop and grieve because the emotional toll would paralyze you.

I also remembered impending death, a painful realization consciously accepted a while back, there was no way to avoid the mental anguish. Will it be lonely, peaceful or messy? Denial was never an option.

Where are those nine lives when you need them ?

2009-01-16T16:17:00.004+02:00

Support a Gazan, international calls are free to Gaza!

Global Voices Online recently reported that "Bloggers are calling upon their readers to pick up the phone - and call the residents of Gaza to show them support." Check the post and support the bloggers as well.

This is a super idea, and comes to reinforce the generous step that the General Posts and Telecommunications Co (GPTC) in Libya had taken..

We received an sms on January 7th, informing us that in solidarity with Gaza, calls to the Palestinian Territories will be free of charge from any landline or mobile in Libya from now until the end of February 2009!

I have several Palestinian friends but I never dare call them because their number starts with +972 which is the code for Israel so we chat on skype instead.

I know that the Palestinian Territories have been assigned their own international code of +970 a few years ago but had no idea how widespread it was as there was some controversy and objection over that.

Ordinary Libyans and Palestinians living in Libya have made use of the GPTC offer and phoned their families and friends or even made random calls, some and I have first hand report of that have even fallen in love with someone at the other end. Amidst all the carnage there is still hope.

What are you waiting for ? go and pick up that phone

2009-01-04T23:53:00.002+02:00

"A bleeding homeland of a bleeding people"

I have been trying to avoid making such a post since before Israel began pounding Gaza a week ago. This post is not about who started what when or whether the egg came before the chicken and the whole painful story spanning over six decades. It only brings bitterness, and I no longer have hopes for a swift and just solution (so I won't talk about that). I won't even draw parallels between Gaza 08/09, Lebanon 2006 and Iraq 2003.

What I'm sure of is that Palestine more than any place in the world evokes strong connotations in the Arab world. As someone paraphrasing the famous Palestinian poet Mahmoud Darwish said "Palestine is [..] a metaphor - for the loss of Eden, for the sorrows of dispossession and exile, for the declining power of the Arab world in its dealings with the West."

In this context, Libyan cities have witnessed a number of demonstrations in solidarity with the Palestinian people, the latest of which took place this morning in Tripoli.

Moreover, Libya has always been generous with its aid. Suffice it to say that it was the first Arab country that in defiance of the sanctions imposed on Gaza since 2007 attempted to send a boat to the Gaza strip last year only to be ordered back by Israeli warships with the advice from Israeli foreign ministry spokesman Yigal Palmor that "anyone wishing to transfer humanitarian aid into Gaza is welcome to do it in coordination with Israel and through the regular crossings. They can also contact Egypt."
This time Libya heeded this advice and sent planeloads of humanitarian aid via Egypt, that were barred on December 28 from landing, probably until further clearance is obtained from the necessary authorities in Israel, Egypt and maybe the USA. I did not follow the diplomacy at work behind the scenes but I'm relieved to read that the next day whatever problem was seemed to have been resolved and the consignment was delivered thereby forming the first link to a chain of aid over the next days.I hope it does reach the Gazan people as it gives one the selfish feeling that at least we are doing something.

As the blood once again spills into our living rooms - especially now with the ground assault that started on the evening of Saturday 3rd January, emotions are consequently running high in our region, with tolerance levels sometimes verging on the non-existent.

It will serve no purpose to mention casualties and body count from the Palestinian side in this latest episode because numbers are always ridiculously and unbearably high, and I'm sure someone else has already recorded them.

Hence, whilst all 32 dead and 600 wounded Israelis and their families, victims of Palestinian rockets since 2001 up to now do get my sympathy and while I do understand the plight of those Israelis suffering post traumatic stress syndrome, having been myself exposed to a relatively limited but intense experience 22 years ago; I must admit that the plight of the Gazans who I'm sure are now beyond 'mere' PTSS strikes a totally different chord not only within me but within many others.

In this regard Darwish's 1988 poem "O those who pass between fleeting words" which I always associate with any occupying army ( so do not dare call me anti-Semitic!) has been playing not only on my Ipod for the last two years but also in my head. To me it has a timeless quality and the metaphors so beloved by Mahmoud Darwish make it possible depending on one's mood to be interpreted or misinterpreted.
Below is one English translation from "Intifada: The Palestinian Uprising Against Israeli Occupation", courtesy of the following gentlemen: Zachary Lockman and Joel Beinin.

O THOSE WHO PASS BETWEEN FLEETING WORDS

0 those who pass between fleeting words
carry your names, and be gone
Rid our time of your hours, and be gone
Steal what you will from the blueness of the sea and the sand of memory
Take what pictures you will, so that you understand
That which you never will:
How a stone from our land builds the ceiling of our sky.

0 those who pass between fleeting words
From you the sword,from us the blood
From you steel and fire,from us our flesh
From you yet another tank,from us stones
From you tear gas,from us rain
above us, as above you, are sky and air
So take your share of our blood, and be gone
Go to a dancing party, and be gone
As for us, we have to water the martyrs' flowers
As for us, we have to live as we see fit.

0 those who pass between fleeting words
As bitter dust, go where you wish, but
Do not pass between us like flying insects
For we have work to do in our lands
We have wheat to grow which we water with our bodies' dew
We have that which does not please you here
Stones or partridges
So take the past if you wish to the antiquities market
And return the skeleton to the hoopoe, if you wish,
On a clay platter
We have that which does not please you: we have the future
And we have things to do in our land.

0 those who pass between fleeting words
Pile your illusions in a deserted pit, and be gone
Return the hand of time to the law of the golden calf
Or to the time of the revolver's music
For we have that which does not please you here, so be gone
And we have what you lack
A bleeding homeland of a bleeding people
A homeland fit for oblivion or memory

0 those who pass between fleeting words
It is time for you to be gone
Live wherever you like, but do not live among us
It is time for you to be gone
Die wherever you like, but do not die among us
For we have work to do in our land
We have the past here
The first cry of life
We have the present, the present and the future
We have this world here, and the hereafter
So leave our country
Our land, our sea
Our wheat, our salt, our wounds
Everything, and leave
The memories of memory

For my Arabic speaking readers here is the link for عابرون في كلام عابر and a bonus link for those of you who may also want to enjoy it in Syrian diva Assala Nasri's voice.

2008-12-30T00:10:00.005+02:00

The Libyan blogging scene: Reflections on 2008 and The Highlander Award for Excellence

First of all Happy New Hijri (Islamic) Year 1430!

I have not been blogging as much as I had planned too. Also it's been the year where many of the Libyan bloggers contracted the Libyan Disappearing Syndrome ™ Chris in Manitoba :P

In fact back in October I wanted to write a longer post about this phenomenon but only managed this brief mention.

Many bloggers have not updated for months and others for over a year. We can see this in Khalid's very convenient aggregator called All Libyan Blogs.

There are also some blogs who have become 'open to invited readers only', so only a few enjoy the bloggers wit, which is as good as being closed anyway. Some bloggers have deleted their blog. Others have requested not to be linked to anymore.

I know and understand that it is the blogger's personal choice, this is their space and that sometimes life interacts with the best plans. Yet I still feel saddened when one part of the mosaic is missing.It means to me that one conversation that could enrichthe rest of the world about us Libyans is missing. It also means we are not able to keep in touch. And yes I do miss each blogger. One more thing is that we have all linked to each other and when the blog is unavailable the link and hence a good story is irrevocably gone.

I liked A. Akak's gesture, he has gracefully bowed out of the scene last month without burning bridges and has left his blog for us to peruse and check fond memories. Miss you.

Still all in all, Libyan bloggers have had many adventures and new experiences, some have gotten married, engaged, graduated, had children, moved abroad to study, moved our emotions for a cause, others have gone through heartbreak, lost loved ones or have fallen ill. They have all kept us riveted to their story.

I have lived to see a rise in blogging physicians and interns from Libya. They are keeping the tradition alive along with the older iconic generation.

I'm especially proud of the Libyan bloggers who are making the effort to write in English which is not their mother tongue and which they they only studied at the public school in Libya (I have yet to see a foreigner of non Asian origin blogging in Arabic :P ).

The end of 2008 and specifically the Internet cut ten days ago, has witnessed a resurgence of Libyan posts. As if we needed to feel the web slipping to be jolted back from our lethargy. Some of us made a spectacular comeback after being MIA for a over a year. A big welcome back to Romana and Lost Libyan, superb posts both of you.

To compensate for not doing the monthly roundups that I used to enjoy mulling over the last couple of years, I started my Libyan blogs competition last year calling it the Highlander Award for Excellence ( how corny is that eh ?). You can check last year's results here.

So the top Libyan bloggers for 2008 according to Highlander are:

(1) Anglo Libyan, he has been blogging non-stop, thru thick and thin even when the global economic crisis affected him on a personal basis and he was made redundant. He has kept his humour and civility and entertained us all. Good luck job hunting Anglo.

(2) Enlightened Spirit, who is now blogging from the US while she is doing postgraduate studies in medicine. I loved her spirited posts ( pun intended) and how she presents herself honestly and with no affectation.

(3) The Dregias, who warmly share their home and life with us and who have magnificently navigated through a 2008 which was full of blessings and pain.

(4) Khalidjorni, who is a genius at bringing out controversial stories on Libya

(5) PH, who is a genius at bringing out Western political controversial stories, and then follows with a joke in the next post to lighten the mood.

(6) Lebeeya, whom we sadly cannot read for the moment but who guarantees a good laugh each time she posts. Lebeeya expert at multitasking, handling a successful career, top notch postgraduate studies, a life full of fun and activities and still managing to share all her passion with us. She was last officially seen at the hairdresser and we miss her very much.

The top adopted Libyan for this year remains Ibeebarbie. ... While Khadijateri is runner up for the cute cameos about her life in Libya, but also the innovative approach to show us the negative aspects about Libyans.

From the non Libyan blogosphere my favourites are: (1) the Angry Arab, especially now that his comment section is closed and we can actually enjoy his posts without the rubbish that some commenters were posting. (2) Kabobfest and (3)Global Voices.

The Top Highlander fan for 2008 was Mitchell who has unfortunately deleted his blog.

On the personal side I have managed to meet some more bloggers this year, Libyan, Arab and foreign and the experience was refreshing. If I have not met you yet, then be patient it will come slowly but surely. I have been guilty of commenting very little; I don't really have an excuse, but I do hope to be forgiven because I have read all your posts :)
On the other hand I think I need to read more blogs in Arabic, the talent is palpable and I have no excuse at all.

I don't promise to be going back to the roaring blogging days of 2006 [that is over] but I promise to keep blogging.

Many emailed to ask where are my political blogs, didn't I care about Palestine or Iraq? Where are my opinions about the West etc.. I still have them, it's just that many others are expressing them better than me ... I'm also a bit war weary and need to recharge the batteries.I will get back to more of these type of posts as soon as I'm done with the Libya related ones lined up to be published.

Happy New Year 2009

Love

Highlander

2008-12-26T20:47:00.002+02:00

A very cold spell

"Britain is in the grip of a flu outbreak greater than anything seen in the last eight years, with soaring numbers of people falling ill, new figures show." As soon as my eyes fell on the above sentence I could not help thinking that Britain's case is not an isolated one. The flu outbreak in Libya which started I believe sometime in mid-November is one of the worst I have ever witnessed.

I have no figures from the Secretariat of Health and I have not tried to find any to be honest, also I don't really think it is an epidemic. However, what I know for sure are what are my own eyes are telling me.

(1) At each public or private clinic/hospital I visit, there are rows upon rows of people coughing and sneezing waiting for their turn.
(2) People that have contracted the virus do not recover promptly and it either drags on or they have another cycle of flu with all the associated symptoms.
(3) in most people it no longer stops at the sniffles but it goes on to upper respiratory tract infection ( that's the mildest) if not bronchitis, pneumonia all sorts of breathing difficulties and the famous typical Libyan bujanb (maybe another Libyan blogger could volunteer to explain this term to non-Libyans :P )
(4) The bug it is not discriminating between age groups but school children, the elderly and the immuno-impaired are its earliest victims.
(5) People have been hospitalized and this is unusual as Libyans usually are too 'proud' so accepting to be admitted on the ward means it is serious.
(6) I am one of its victims and have been suffering for over a month now and I know it's bad because I've been privileged not to have caught the flu since 2005.
(7) I have so far bought for our household; prescription and non prescription cough remedies amounting to over 80 Libyan Dinars in addition to 6 types of antibiotics, 3 types of Panadol, Vitamin C effervescent galore.
(8) It had a big impact on schools and businesses
(9) I'm contemplating taking a flu shot next season even though I'm not convinced they are effective.
(10) Egypt recently had one more bird flu related death so could we be having a mix of both? or have I become paranoid ?

(11) oh and my GP is sick too!

2008-12-21T23:10:00.004+02:00

The Web, Customer Service and the Importance of Communication

Pretentious title eh? Seriously though, I won't be the first in stating that we don't realise how essential the internet has become until we lose it. Yes internet is a means of communication and Communication in all its forms is vital to convey any message or a specific message....

This weekend (on Friday in this part of the world), I tried to have a little bit of chit-chat with my friends but was surprised that my home network provided a nil result in connectivity. Having installed a fax line on the same morning, I immediately assumed that I must have messed up some of the internal cables.

So I texted my best friend and he phoned me back to say that this was a country wide problem and that I shouldn't worry. It is hoped that things would be back in order in less than a week. Trusting his advice completely I let it go at that; there was no need to become frantic. Que sera sera….

But it got me pondering about all the emails, work, reading and stuff that we do online and how much being in touch with the outside world has had an enormous impact on our lives. A similar technical problem occurred in the region at the beginning of this year anyway and turned out to be related to some 'force majeure' type of infrastructure accident; then things got back to normal.

I was optimistic that internet being so important for business and since Libya was increasingly business oriented then the people at LTT would find a quick way to reroute the connection even if temporarily. I was not expecting a prompt resolution as it was Friday and they probably were working with a skeleton staff on weekends.

At around midnight both Libyana and Madar customers received a text message in which the "General Authority for Telecom was informing us that there are problems in international communication and the WWW due to a number of severed submarine cables in the Mediterranean basin and that the workers in the telecom sector were doing their best to provide alternative solutions to restore communication". I was actually impressed when I received this message. To me it meant that the people at the Libyan PTT and LTT were really trying to find a solution. This also scored an additional point for customer service delivery; even though I did wish they had sent that country-wide cellphone message in English as well for the non- Arab community in Libya. I'm sure it would have prevented wild speculations among foreigners and jumping to conclusion that "life in the third world sucks sometimes" as Khadijateri puts it.

LTT do have a message to customers in English on their website (not sure when did they put it up ) though and their website was one of the few still accessible on Friday.

"Libya Telecom and Technology would like to inform its customers that the problems in the internet connection are a result of main communication cable problems, which has affected the entire Mediterranean region. Our Employees are giving their best efforts to return service through alternative networks."

It came as no surprise that internet connectivity was restored yesterday morning (i.e. in less than 24hrs) even though it was considerably slower. Today the connection is faster than dial-up but slower than our usual ADSL - which is to be expected due to congestion in traffic. I mean "major damage to the internet backbone can cause major problems despite redundancy which allows some re-routing. The loss of so much bandwidth is likely to have an impact".

Kudos to the Libya team for delivering on their promise (whatever way they managed to do it, via satellite or even if it meant making the necessary phone calls at least we are back online).

Tarek Siala has noted the same thing " ولكن الذي أعجبني وأثار إهتمامي هو قدرة شركة ليبيا للإتصالات والتقنية على إعادة الإنترنت في ثاني يوم (السبت) مباشرة، فبينما لازالت بقية الدول" تعاني من إنقطاع الإنترنت، كانت الإنترنت متوفرة في ليبيا،

This BBC article shed some additional light on the issue."We've lost three out of four lines. If the fourth cable breaks, we're looking at a total blackout in the Middle East". Then later in the day many specialised websites brought it up. Basically 4 lines are damaged; damage is usually due to ships' anchors and seismic activity. There are 3 lines damaged near Alexandria and one off Sicily. There was also suspected seismic activity around Malta.

Three out of four is a major problem, and as Libya is also linked through this cable that comes from Italy we have been affected. Moreover, newswebsites are not obliged to list ALL the countries that are affected, they mostly mention the ones that are more prominent on the business/political map. Case in point for example:"The UAE telecom operator said the damage to three cables resulted in high levels of network congestion and degradation of international voice service and data traffic, affecting all customers in the UAE, Levant, Egypt and parts of Africa." [Gulf News]. But the whole article is worth a read.

From the comment section of the BBC again I can see that this latest of cable cuts has affected the net in various countries as far away as Australia and the US and as near as Malta and the UK. I did not hear the Australians comparing themselves to a third world country.

The following article references a number of such cuts that occurred in several places worldwide. It also shows maps of the fiber optic submarine cable locations and which can potentially affect a country or group of countries or regions. Not one single sentence mentions a third world experience!

It is often said that communication is a powerful tool. I agree 100%, don't you ;)

2008-12-11T22:28:00.004+02:00

Ten years of LOVE

Holding her to my bosom today, I am surprised to feel each rib sticking out painfully. The vertebral column seems ready to snap. Poor thing, it took 10 years of patiently feeding only to have her loose it all in less than 3 months. Holding her now is breaking my heart but I don’t know what else I can do but hold her to show my love. Every trick has failed, treatments have also failed ....she seems to have decided to fade gracefully and without much fuss.

When I hold her in my arms now, she is lighter than the puppy she was when we first brought her home yet scarily enough she is the same size. It is so sad to see her necklace dangling loose like something that should not be there. But when she looks at me with those soulful eyes I know deep inside she is still the same just very weary and terribly sick.
She comes and snuggles next to me everynight and I have to be careful lest I squash her by mistake.

Why do we always need to loose those we love most? Her life has not been scrape free and she gave me lots of white hairs since the last time here. But I’ve found that cats are very proud animals and like going away with dignity, somehow I've resigned myself to this and at the same time feel guilty about it.

At this rate the end is soon, but a tiny corner of my heart is still hoping that this is but a bad dream as miracles have been known to happen. A pet is also a member of the family... so pray with me.

2008-12-04T20:51:00.003+02:00

Eid Adha Mubarak to you all next week!

2008-11-15T19:38:00.003+02:00

Myriam Makeba: 1932 - 2008

When my parents told me we were going to attend a concert I wasn't really impressed. Usually my siblings and I rarely accompanied them to social/cultural events. (Today's kids would jump at the chance to go to a concert but probably a rock / pop one :P )

So they dragged me a bit reluctantly - I mean I had no idea what kind of legend Makeba was . But from the first beat of the music and when her voice rose through the hall I was under her spell.
Rummaging to our old photo album I found the picture of me sitting in the audience holding my two hands together as if in prayer in total rapture.

It is the Makeba voice which made me love sounds of Africa and it is sad indeed to see that she is no more.

2008-10-22T01:14:00.002+02:00

Where is everyone ?

I've been trying to catch up with some of my favourite Libyan blogs but many are no longer available for reading and others have not been updated for months.

It's funny how you get attached to the personality of a blogger and he/she becomes an important part of your daily reading.

What's up? I miss you all so much :)

Type rest of the post here

2008-09-28T23:44:00.010+02:00

Ramadan: body and soul

A.Akak has invited us on his blog to recap the Ramadan experience, and knowing what a blabbermouth I am, it's better to just answer him and elaborate in this page.

From the various comments he received the main points I gleaned were:

(1) Ramadan in a non-Muslim country is difficult and does not have the same taste as back home (but may carry more Ajr because of the effort one is making).
(2) People have become more materialistic in Libya.
(3) Blood has thinned in Libya.

( you are welcome to share your point on all three).

As for my personal Ramadan experience? It is my favourite month of the year and comes exactly at the time you need it. The time you save while you don't have to worry about the other meals during the day is spent usefully catching up on a number of things that you wanted to do including most importantly your faith if you are spiritually inclined.

The number of days is just right, not too much and you are bored and not too little and you don't have the time to settle in.

I love Ramadan in any Muslim majority country but Ramadans are the nicest in Arab countries, call me biased if you wish but that's how I feel most comfortable. However...

if you are fasting with some friends in a foreign land it maybe possible to feel OK as well.

The TV shows are always nice in Ramadan because they are all fresh and it's the season (not sure why it became so but hey I'm not here to dissect that aspect). I also know that the rest of the year they will be rebroadcast. Many bloggers have written about TV in Ramadan in the Arab world, critical, for, indifferent or even advocating a boycott.

Apart from the spirituality, family ties and to do list I usually enjoy watching a few Ramadan shows - not too many as I don't have time for TV, but one or two at most.

Not since " Places in the Heart" in 2005 have I watched a TV show with such interest, I even remember doing a Ramadan TV series post.

This year I've been watching Bab il Harra Part III, I have missed the first two parts in previous Ramadans but I know that there is Bal il Harra fever all over the Arab world. The best description of this series I found was by blogger 'on the edge' :

"My favorite show we watch each night (making Moe translate anything I might miss) is Bab AL Hara . It is about a old town in 1929 Syria .Much like the British soap opera East Enders , it is centered around a neighborhood and it's residences .There is something for everyone ; murder , intrigue against the French colonial government , gun running , romance , neighborhood fights ,deaths , weddings ,family problems that people are still facing today such as spousal abuse , drug addiction , and divorce .The characters are all strong even the women , which I like because they are not wusses ! The men show tender sides which most Arab men try to hide but are known to have now and then , lol .And like I said before , there are many relevant issues featured , that are you still have in this modern life . The show is so popular that it is in Wikpedia ".

In case you are not hooked, MBC channel's website is offering you to watch it online free as well the next day if you missed some episode. I decided to check for myself how this worked and ended up being hooked on my second show for this year the Egyptian soap opera Ba3d il furaq (after the separation). In one week I watched all 19 episodes online then was all caught up with the TV and could follow it daily. Nothing special it's just another romantic story with star crossed childhood sweethearts.

So if you livve in Europe or the US and do not have access to satellite reception you can watch your favourite Ramadan series online here, just let the episode cache then it's cool ! enjoy without the advertisements :)

Tomorrow Monday is the last day of Ramadan in Libya, and since I hardly go out I have no comments about shopping or bad manners that others have experienced.

Though I'm satisfied with my Ramadan, I wish that I had more time to do extra duties for my eternal soul as one never knows when God will take the gift of life he has entrusted to us and I am not 100% sure that I will deserve his heaven and not sure that I will see another Ramadan either. After all we are growing older.

Eid Fitr Mubarak to you all!

Update 30/9/08

I received this cartoon about the Ramadan series in the Arab world - from left to right : Syria, Egypt, Gulf countries :P Enjoy

2008-09-16T23:59:00.007+02:00

Omar Mukhtar and the legacy of colonialism

Web statistics constantly remind me that my Omar Mukhtar and Italian occupation posts remain the main reasons for which people come to my blog.

But just in case I had forgotten, a text message sent by Al Madar company on the eve of this anniversary endeavoured to remind us about this date in history while my youngest brother brought it also to my attention when we were chatting last night... both these instances did not seem like a coincidence especially that I've been trying to ignore recent events related to that painful era...

Omar Mukhtar represents to me and to others Libyans of various generations all what heroism is about. Libyans have not forgotten their martyrs we celebrate each name in our way because their are too many to list. Our heroes are well and alive in the memories of their grandchildren and Omar Mukhtar no longer is famous for himself only but he has come to symbolise the Libyan unsung heroes of the colonial era whom foreigners may not know and for whom a list of names and tribal identities mean nothing. That is why Omar Mukhtar is doubly special.

In 2004 I mentioned the main components of Libya's demands for compensation from Italy, which I am copying again here for easier reference:

a-Italy should acknowledge its historical crimes against the people of Libya
b-Furnish all details about the thousands of Libyans forcibly exiled onto some Italian islands
c-Furnish maps showing where thousands of Italian landmines were laid in Libya
d-Pay full compensation to the families of all victims of Italian terrorism
e-Return all historical treasures and artifacts stolen from Libya

Let's look at what happened to these demands in light of the recent world developments last month.

a-Italy did acknowledge its historical crimes against the people of Libya with some saying that Berlusconi kissed the hands of Omar Mukhtar's son !

b- If someone has read anything about this let me know.

c- The news mention that mine clearing was brought on the table, but I was hoping for some more concrete hard fact like, equipment, expertise, maps and cash. It is worth noting that "according to reports compiled by the Libyan police, 11,845 landmine casualties were recorded between 1940 and 1995, including 6,749 people killed and 5,096 injured" that is a high number for Libya. Bearing in mind the alleged mines planted during the border war with Egypt and Chad (in 1977 and sometime in 80s) it is the WWII legacy which is inflicting the damage and even with maps it is difficult to locate those mines because of the shifting sands.

d- The compensation consists of a total of 5 billion US$ to be paid in investment deals over a period of 25 years. My only comment would be to check here.

e- From all the treasures stolen from Libya one sole statue has finally been returned.

Omar Mukhtar and our grandparents sacrifices have not been in vain, but the farcical compensation is not fooling anyone. A British acquaintance the other day was laughing and saying this is colonialism from a different door - I guess he knew what he was saying after all aren't the Brits the masters in the art of colonialism? The gentleman may not have been far from the truth because "in return for its gesture, Italy expects to reap great rewards, in the form of multi-billion dollar contracts, and tighter security controls over flows of illegal immigrants", but also COMPENSATION for the descendants of the Italian colonialists who have been expelled from Libya!

But I have not written about Sheikh Omar for a while so why now? because by association with Italy's occupation I came across this great article on Hafed's blog from which I have already quote above, whereby one specific paragraph epitomises all what ails the Middle East and North Africa region - better known as the Arab world :P

"A major reason for the mess and mediocrity that define so many Arab-Asian-African countries is their unnatural birth at the hands of retreating European colonial midwives। Because they were manufactured by fleeing European occupiers, many countries in our region have enjoyed neither the logic of a sensible balance among natural and human resources, nor the compensatory vitality that comes from self-determinant and truly sovereign states."

This is a powerful statement! Look at us in Libya we are still affected by colonialism decades after Omar's death, imagine the compounded effect in the other countries ? It does not mean we should take that as an excuse not to do anything for our betterment but it does mean we should acknowledge this fact when discussing our inadequacies . We should remember that even though many of us are aware of our appalling shortcomings we still need to go through a natural birthing process then things will fall into place. Patches and induced labour can be not only painful but lethal sometimes.

2008-09-10T18:16:00.006+02:00

The US 2008 Elections: a cloning apparatus ( updated)

I know, I know it's not the sequel to the Health in Libya post, but many have emailed me and others have commented to ask about my opinion on the US election, so it's time to insert my token post about these elections :

In another life and another election I complained that we should be allowed to take part in US elections because the person in the Oval Office yields so much power that has the potential to negatively or positively affect the rest of the world.

I also followed and actually tried to makes sense of political parties and candidates.Four years later my disillusion is complete to the point where I do not even follow the elections anymore. Moreover my conclusion in 2004, does not wildly differ from 2008.

Look at it this way, Ms Condoleeza Rice was here a few days ago and apart from a couple of American mums -bloggers living in Libya, I have not seen any Libyan blogger bother to comment about this visit. That should be telling no ? Four years ago I would have written a long post about it....

But I am digressing ...some of my American friends will not be voting because they do not like the choice of candidates available. And although I think it should no longer matter to us in the Middle East who is president -because the policy has never changed at its core- I kept encouraging my friends to vote for the person who will do most good to their economy and internal affairs. However, when someone asked " hey Highlander what do you think of Obama ? I'm sure you are glad there is a black candidate right?" No, I don't care what colour the president is but would it be surprising to say all US presidential nominees and their running mates seem like clones to me.

Too many bloggers and pundits have written about Mc Cain and Obama so I won't bore you about that but apparently the stakes are a bit different with the appearance of Governor Palin on the scene. Her speech was supposedly cathartic. I listened to some tidbits here and while the sound bites resonate well, she also has the oil connection :)

Yet, it does not matter who wins to me, because any would be president or president who pledges allegiance to Israel is a lost cause in my book even if he/she were a member of my own tribe. Newcomer Palin has not escaped this circle and has joined the queue :P. at AIPAC.

The day I see a US candidate not trembling before Israel is the day I know that America is in good hands again because I am not convinced that one needs to stand by Israel to be patriotic.

Oh and don't anyone dare label me as anti-Semitic although you are welcome to share with me with civility where you think I'm wrong/right . Also do not compare democracies and non-democracies or America's system of governance and that in Arab world ( despite it not being homogenous) as that would be off topic.

This was my personal two cents about the topic not that of Libya, Libyans, the Middle East, North Africa, the Arab World or even the Muslim world. All these entities I'm sure have a differing view.

If it sounds pessimistic that's my view lately :P So may the best man/woman win.

Update 12/9/08

Khalid did blog about Ms Rice visit here. My blog reader is not doing it's job of updating my reads properly :P

2008-09-05T00:49:00.004+02:00

Five years, Five Ramadans!

Though I've been on blogs since August 2003 it was only in September that I made my first post.. it's been five whole years full of laughter, tears and tough but useful learning processes.

It has also been five Ramadans, and the first week of Ramadan 08 is almost coming to an end already. Mashallah!

Thank you to those of you my friends who have sent me their congratulations that is really appreciated from the heart.

I would like to take the opportunity of this podium to wish everyone a Blessed Holy Month of Ramadan to you and your families.

Highlander

2008-08-23T21:16:00.009+03:00

The Health Situation in Libya: Part I cancer

"Every single time they called or I called [Libya] they told me of someone who just died or who is dying. The cause of death is either a car accident or cancer." Laments Sereeb.

For a country of less than 6 million people this statement should raise a thousand red flags!

Sereeb was not the first one to notice this anomaly related to chronic diseases, I pointed out in my previous post that "I have lost six friends to cancer, while another five are in various stages of survival/remission. I have also lost one to a heart attack, and two to car accidents and I have one friend recovering from a stroke." This means at least 11 of my friends have cancer; I have not brought up the neighbours, work colleagues, family members, acquaintances and their families, neighbours etc…thinking exponentially and factoring in the funerals I have attended I would say it is a national disaster.

Before you proceed to my report below please ensure you read and understand this disclaimer: the following is not a research done by scientific methods. I have no hard numbers or statistics to give but only my own personal observations- so please do not use it as a weapon against me or Libyans.

OK – with this out of the way we can move on…

My first observation that something was amiss was when the number of miscarriages in Libya spiraled alarmingly in the mid 80s. From that time up to now I can confidently say that the majority of Libyan married women have had at least one miscarriage during their first year of marriage and before the birth of their first child. This is NOT NORMAL. Notice I said majority – not all! For those who did not have a miscarriage then we need to dig a bit deeper and of course there are always exceptions to the rule. I noticed this first with my aunts who began founding families in the mid 80s. I also noticed that this phenomenon began in the mid 80s onward roughly when the following international issues were unfolding.

o Eldorado Canyon
o The Chernobyl disaster (the fires did last for 10 days)
o The Aozou strip border conflict
o Desert Storm

For the sake of objectivity I would like to add the following factors:
o Social upheaval
o Environmental Pollution

I've read many articles, papers and books and I understand that my story could be criticised as unsubstantiated, but I'm simply searching for a cause not conspiracy theories or a scapegoat.

Two essential things I've noted during the last decades:

(1) Fertility has decreased in Libya, families now average 3-5 kids, whereas before it used to be 6-10. Increasingly IVF pregnancies are sought in Jordan (for the sake of discretion as this is a sensitive topic) Meanwhile Libyan women are showing a range of gynae/obstetric complaints. The UNICEF report gives us the following figures for total fertility rate in Libya: 2006 = 2.8, in 1990 = 4.8 and in 1970= 7.6. Not sure what that means. [ref]

It could be socially related such as marrying later in life of course but not if it is chronic-diseases-related.

(2) Cancer in all forms is widespread but particularly, breast, ovarian and uterine cancer in women, prostate cancer for men and leukemia and cancer of the stomach in both genders. I don't think it is due to improved screening process because we don't have that kind of attitude and culture established yet. Ex: Libyan women in their 30s do not automatically have mammograms or even breast self examination at home.

Basically when Libyans go to the doctor it means it is serious.

Surveillance of non-communicable diseases in Libya and particularly cancer may not yet have been underway. But in 2003 there was apparently a first attempt at collecting such data in Benghazi. The population in eastern Libya is 1.6 million; cancer cases registered in 2003 were 997.[ref]

The annual report from the Secretariat of Health and Environment for 2007 is finally out and it apparently contains a survey of cancer cases registered from both Western and Eastern regions of Libya, but the electronic full copy has still not been loaded to the official website.

A- Social/cultural causes:

National authorities have reported that 13% of the mortality in Libya is attributed to cancer as a result of social and lifestyle changes ( ex : change in smoking pattern and prevalence).

B. Environmental issues possibly due to modernization, sanctions and military ambitions

(1) Water pollution:
"The combined impact of sewage, oil byproducts, and industrial waste threatens the nation's coast and the Mediterranean Sea generally. Libya has 0.8 cu km of renewable water resources with 87% used in farming activity and 4% for industrial purposes. Only about 68% of the people living in rural areas have pure drinking water. The nation's cities produce about0.6 million tons of solid waste per year. [ref]

Potential hazards are detailed here as well.[ref]

(2) Carbon Emission:
Libya has the highest CO2 emissions per capita in Africa on a par with Japan and UK. [ref]

The ILSA act of 1996 most probably had some kind of detrimental impact on these results by preventing investment in the oil sector that could have helped purchase equipment and material to curb this environmental disaster.

(3) The quest for chemical, biological and nuclear arsenals:
Various attempts were exerted since the 80s with Rabta, Sebha and Tarhuna plants being among the most famous along with the Tajoura nuclear research reactor as Dr Joshua Sinai kindly mentions in this now old (1997) but relevant analysis.

Anyway as we know these efforts all culminated in Libya's now famous dismantling of its WMD programme in 2004. However, we can only guess whether these activities have released toxins into the environment. There are no studies to my knowledge.

(4) Agriculture and Aquaculture:
Libya is on the Mediterranean and Tuna is a staple Libyan diet a study in 1997 reveals that the metal levels found in it are not considered toxic. [ref]
I don't understand those results but maybe blogger Maya M can. I'm sure someone did a more current survey.

As for crops, I fear there is indiscriminate and uncontrolled use of pesticides, but that is only my hunch. I've also noted too many plastic houses in farms. As for cattle and poultry I think that businesses are abusing the public trust with the imported cattle feed but then greed and corruption is universal.

For some at a glance statistics which I don't understand, look here,

C. The Aozou Strip:

This "long stretch of desolate land located in the middle of the Sahara Desert [has been a] zone of contention among the colonial powers of Africa, and […] between the now independent and sovereign countries of Chad and Libya". Libya captured it in 1973. "It remained in Libyan hands until a Chadian offensive in the late 1980s. In 1990, the two countries finally agreed to take their dispute to the International Court of Justice, which ruled in early 1994 that the Aozou Strip belonged to Chad." [ref]

We won't dwell on the casualties or the historical ownership for this land which was stupidly given up/left in limbo in the 50s (another story), but the salient question is
"Why would two countries engage in hostilities over a stretch of desert? According to rumors, the Aozou Strip contains rich deposits of uranium." [ref]

This is related to pursuit of military advantage mentioned in paragraph B(3) earlier. On the other hand although the common understanding is that uranium has not been mined yet, but in the proverbial fog of war we have no idea what happened, but what we can be certain of is that uranium is radioactive and toxic.

D. Chernobyl:

Photo source [ref].

Information states that " there is no evidence nor any likelihood of an increase attributable to Chernobyl in birth defects, adverse pregnancy outcomes, decreased fertility or any other radiation-induced disease in the general population either in the contaminated areas or further afield." But it also states that "the lighter material [released] was carried by wind over the Ukraine, Belarus, Russia and to some extent over Scandinavia and Europe." [ref]

Yet crops, flora, fauna, milk, water bodies and fish have been contaminated in Europe [ref]

A recent study in 2007 maintains that kids were affected in Sweden because their mental development was impaired in utero. [ref]

Apparently the radiation cloud from the Chernobyl accident was "eventually detected all over the world. Events, such as volcano eruptions and nuclear bomb testings, result in major effluent emission that also can be detected with very sensitive equipment.[…] on the other hand the occurrence of chronic affects may never be validated because such relatively small increments are statistically indistinguishable in the face of the great variability of spontaneous cancer rates." [ref]

D. Desert Storm (the Gulf War):

That's very close in the Near East and what is interesting to know is this bit: " The third and largest phase of the air campaign ostensibly targeted military targets throughout Iraq and Kuwait: Scud missile launchers, weapons of mass destruction sites, weapons research facilities and naval forces.[...]Allied bombing raids were successful in destroying Iraqi civilian infrastructure. 11 of Iraq's 20 major power stations and 119 substations were totally destroyed, while a further six major power stations were damaged.[28][29] At the end of the war, electricity production was at four percent of its pre-war levels. Bombs destroyed the utility of all major dams, most major pumping stations and many sewage treatment plants, turning Iraq from one of the most advanced Arab countries into one of the most backward. Telecommunications equipment, port facilities, oil refineries and distribution, railroads and bridges were also destroyed." [ref]

While destruction of enemy infrastructure maybe a standard procedure in war I am left to wonder what sort of toxic material was released from all this and particularly how much. From Iraq to the region needs only a short leap of imagination.

That was before even hearing about the depleted uranium. " They were told depleted uranium was not hazardous. Now 23 years after a US arms plant closed, workers and residents have cancer " [ref].

In a 2003 article in CS Monitor, I read with shock and awe that " depleted-uranium bullets are made of low-level radioactive nuclear-waste material, left over from the making of nuclear fuel and weapons. It is 1.7 times as dense as lead, and burns its way easily through armor. But it is controversial because it leaves a trail of contamination that has half-life of 4.5 billion years - the age of our solar system."

No comment!

E. Eldorado Canyon
This was an aerial bombing of Libyan cities in 1986 (you can read my rant here).

I'm wondering what was the ammunition; what 'shit' did the bombs that fell on us from the sky contain? this site though interesting and lengthy provided no concrete information [ref]

From the Chernobyl cloud it is clear that meteorological patterns were a contributing factor in the spread of toxic pollutants to Europe, it is therefore easy to believe some material may have been carried from Europe to North Africa or to the Middle East. From space photographs the zone affected is wider than thought. I remember vividly that day in April 1986 as it came not too long after the US bombing over Libya; and the sky on that day was grey and murky even though we had not heard about Chernobyl immediately.

Blogger Shlemazl who grew up in the USSR and is coincidently a nuclear physicist (I think) could be able to help me understand.

Right on the thread of weather and climate, I would like to add that Libya has famous sandstorms whereby "dust from the Sahara Desert can be transported over thousands of kilometres by convection currents, which also cause other meteorological conditions, such as thunderstorms. Because the Sahara, where sandstorms are very common, is a major source of mineral dust, large concentrations of the dust can be found in the tropical Atlantic and the Caribbean." [ref]

Hence looking at photos I have no problem imagining what can be carried in these particles whether from the desert or back from Europe. If you look at my photos here from 2006 you will have an idea [ref]

Since military hostilities and industrial accidents (as we know) do have an effect on the environment and this can be compounded by the weather peculiarities and since we are an oil producing country, Highlander became curious about pollution indices in Libya. I could not find much except for a study on the Gulf of Sirte area for levels of radiation. I'm sure it is fine but again I'm not qualified enough to decipher it. Volunteers are welcome.

In conclusion cancer alone in Libya is of epic proportion. I would venture to say it is the number 3 killer and I'm not sure such a large number of cases is normal. I tried to think of all the possible causes but as a layperson and someone not in the field of medicine or research I understand my limitations and accept that I could be wrong but at least maybe it can inspire some thoughts. What I am sure about though is that too many Libyans are dying of cancer.

I believe that Libya's biggest concerns are chronic diseases, with cardiovascular, cancer and diabetes topping the list, while the no. 2 killer are road traffic accidents (RTAs) which are not a 'disease' but which if not fatal can result in debilitating injuries. I will devote a special post to RTAs, meanwhile the next post will discuss Libya's health system and will not be limited to cancer.

Let me know what you think…

2008-08-17T02:09:00.000+03:00

Keep smiling a never ending hope…

Five years ago today I was chatting with my great friend Mahmoud. At that time he was at the intensive care unit at one of the famous hospitals in Amman (Jordan). Mahmoud was having his chemotherapy treatment for leukemia and because he was left with extremely low immunity following this treatment he was vulnerable to the most harmless microbes by our standard. Mahmoud had to spend weeks in a special room where people could only visit him wearing what I would call aeorospace gear or CDC suits. But Mahmoud had a laptop and internet connection and I could keep him company and even see him online. He had his mobile as well but we only used it briefly because it would tire him.

On that day we were talking about his progress and how much he felt better and was only waiting for his blood count to improve to be able to return to Tripoli. He was alone in Amman as usual. He has been going for his treatment there for two years and had finally beaten the monster. I was at the office and I was chuckling at the jokes he was cracking and marveling at his spirit. After all he kept the secret of his illness almost two years and only told me recently before this trip.

I knew Hamoudi from college, we were in the same year and the same study groups throughout the entire academic process because we were classified alphabetically and also by our ranking in class. We shared the same bench, courses, helped each other to study and do homework, and after we graduated we compared notes and met up regularly to catch up on each other. He would call me every time he was traveling abroad, and he would come and visit me upon his return always bringing chocolates and gifts. The only long periods when he did not call were the times he was having treatment before I knew about his battle with cancer. Never once did I hear him complain, never once utter a sigh. In his presence I had immense joy and calmness, and his eyes radiated warmth and sincerity. So we were chatting and as usual I was sending a lot of emoticons with smileys when he suddenly sent me a heart shape. Then he typed that the nurse is asking him to rest and that he will talk to me later. I said good bye and logged off.

About ten or fifteen minutes later Hamoudi sent me a text message "keep smiling ..always!"
I thought of ringing him up but the moment passed as I had a meeting so I rang him after the meeting, but his phone was not being picked up so I assumed it was on silent mode and rang him the next day.. but the next day his phone was closed so I assumed he was doing his usual silent treatment when he wanted to rest and not be disturbed. And I told myself he'll contact me when he comes back home or when he feels like it as usual.
I was thinking to myself that Mahmoud was a wonderful friend and his gentle behaviour and considerate actions let alone his longstanding friendship were not negligible and if he asked me to marry him as he had been hinting about for the last year and as mum was expecting from the stories I shared with her I would accept because he was someone you could trust to build a home with.

A few days later I was at a meeting outside my office and ran into another classmate Aisha. After the usual greetings she asked me:
- Highlander have you heard about Mahmoud?
- What about him I said? I was chatting with him a few days ago he's getting better and coming home soon.
- Oh I'm sorry H, she said, he had a cold and didn't make it..
I was awestruck ..when when did he die I uttered how can he die we were just talking and laughing a few days ago he even sent me a text message here see the date on my mobile! That's the date he died on Aisha said. Suddenly I felt my chest close and the tears welled up inside my eyes, have they brought him ? yes his brother did and they are burying him today in their village. Can we go and attend the burial are you going? who is going? Well his brother informed us and he said that the girls don't have to come because the village is very far and he knows it is difficult for you to drive alone. Do you have his phone number I said ? I want to talk to Hamoudi's brother and check with him are you sure he is dead maybe you are mistaken? Aisha told me she did not have the phone number but will try and locate it and will let me know.

When I went back to my office I was frantically calling our close classmates to ask them and yes most of the guys heard and were going to the burial. But I still could not believe it. Then an idea struck me, I will call Hamoudi's Libya cell phone and if someone else picks up then he is dead for sure. I rang the phone, after 3 rings a voice answered; it was similar to Hamoudi's but more subdued where Hamoudi's was full of laughter. "Hello I croaked my name is Highlande and I am Mahmoud's friend from university is the news true ? " I had a sinking feeling but I still hoped against any hopes until his brother Mohammed shattered my hopes… " yes miss H. Mahmoud has passed away… thank you for your condolences and please as I told all the other girls we do not expect you to be here please your phone call is enough…" but how I said ? It's God's will he replied he had a cold he went to lie down to rest and died in his sleep he was simply too weak..
I hung up the phone and cried and cried silently in my office. He had died alone just after he sent me the sms…and before logging off I had told him goodbye instead of the usual 'talk to you soon'. As if his soul and mine knew already… was he lonely? Did he hurt? Was he afraid ? what were his last thoughts?

It's been five years but his number is still programmed in my mobile I can’t delete it and his last message is there peering at me from time to time. When I feel the world crushing at my sides and the pain unbearable, I scroll way down to his message and read 'keep smiling …always'…even from beyond the grave his words have brought me hope and courage to continue the journey. Thank you Hamoudi you will never be forgotten.

Since we graduated I have lost six friends to cancer, while another five are in various stages of survival/remission. I have also lost one to a heart attack, and two to car accidents and I have one friend recovering from a stroke. The plight of my friends has brought something important to my attention the health situation in Libya, but that dear readers would be the subject of my upcoming post.