Friday, January 25, 2008

Each soul can only bear so much

A week ago I felt I'd reached once more rock bottom. I wallowed in tragedy and forgot the vow I had taken upon myself in 2006 "Nobody and nothing is worth the hours I lay in bed pondering my own misery or even death ". Then your letters started filling up my inbox, and I found out how much people care regardless of opinions and disagreements. I want to thank all of you who sent me letters and left comments here. The special thanks though will go to Maya M and her beautiful post with the adapted poem "when things go wrong".....


However, it was Safia's comment that woke me up . How could I forget that beautiful Quranic verse she quoted? Below is the full version:

"286. La yukallifu Allahu nafsan illa wusAAaha laha ma kasabat waAAalayha ma iktasabat rabbana la tuakhithna in naseena aw akhtana rabbana wala tahmil AAalayna isran kama hamaltahu AAala allatheena min qablina rabbana wala tuhammilna ma la taqata lana bihi waoAAfu AAanna waighfir lana wairhamna anta mawlana faonsurna AAala alqawmi alkafireena " [ref]

Safia put her thumb on the problem and the solution ( thank you sis). Read the translation and you will understand:

"286 On no soul doth Allah Place a burden greater than it can bear. It gets every good that it earns, and it suffers every ill that it earns. (Pray:) "Our Lord! Condemn us not if we forget or fall into error; our Lord! Lay not on us a burden Like that which Thou didst lay on those before us; Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Blot out our sins, and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. Thou art our Protector; Help us against those who stand against faith." [ref] emphasis mine .

I had a flash of understanding, it was so simple really :)

Highlander could bear the burden, it was the "someone had become the sole list" who did not have enough strenght to bear it and preferred to jump the train early on.
So if God Himself does NOT burden us human beings with more than we can take, who was I as a human to expect another human to accept more than that human could bear ? Nah that would be too much on the poor soul. That was when a big smile formed on my face, their was no need for desperation anymore.




Friday, January 18, 2008

Desperation

Is a state in which all hope is lost or absent; but would the wish/need to escape that state lead to the employment of extreme measures ? is death the only exit ?


This loss of hope feels strange since the people in your entourage see that your life is full of success on all levels. Yet you know better because you have spent a whole afternoon thinking with whom you could share this and mentally crossing out the people from your list because someone had become the sole list.

You project the image of an enchanted life, yet you bleed inside since that faithful day, a day which you kept postponing although you knew that sooner or later it was going to happen.
You pray and dream that you have died everynight you go to bed only to wake up to the same reality: that of the thorns that started to encircle your heart and the ice that is creeping in..








Tuesday, January 01, 2008

Highlander's top blogs choice: Happy 2008

Happy new year - inshallah this year will bring satisfaction of the soul and material success to you all.

A few months ago I thought of doing " my own Libyan blogs competition and give the Highlander Award for excellence or originality once every three months or bi-annually".

Well here we are it's the first day in 2008, time to reflect on the past year and deliver the goods... they are not in any particular order! suspense ?....


tada
- Duniazad and her blog Dunia. Erudite work
- Tasnim - political analysis
- AngloLibyan - well rounded diverse topics
- Safia Speaks - the adventures of a Libyan woman abroad
- PH - smart - wise yet fun
- Lebeeya - one woman show
- White African - a breath of fresh air
- Braveheart - a Libyan knight

From the Arab blogs Riverbend reigns as Queen supreme while Zaydoun from Kuwait Interrupted is the most interesting.

The trophy for honourary Libyans goes to Ibeebarbie and Globetrottingen!

But honestly all the Libyan bloggers are unique :P check Braveheart's Award too :)

A big virtual hug from Highlander